


They Didn't Care

by LonelySail



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe- David Adopts Max, Bullying, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Gender Dysphoria, Max camp camp - Freeform, Past Child Abuse, Self-Harm, Trans David, Trans Max, f-slur, foster dad david, i can barely find any of that real good shit so i'll just write it, lmao headcannoning is great
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-21
Updated: 2018-05-02
Packaged: 2018-12-30 12:46:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 28,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12109038
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LonelySail/pseuds/LonelySail
Summary: Max never had a good home life, School was always difficult, and so Max finally had to do something about it.He packed his bags and set off into the cold, Winter night.





	1. Where It All Started

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story for Camp Camp, and some parts are based off my own experiences with abuse (woops) but hey enjoy  
> Also uh TW: Self Harm, Abuse, Bullying, misgendering, severe cases of depression.

 

Max tugged the straps of his backpack tighter, clouds of hot air fogging his vision as he walked through the darkness of the winter night. He knows his plan would've failed if he ran off during the daytime, but he wishes it was warmer. His traditional hoodie barely fended off the cold, the light wind adding no help. He was well aware that his plan could easily fail, but there was no harm in trying.

His wrists stung and his face throbbed, no doubt there's a black eye. All that could be heard was the crunching of leaves and broken glass underneath his red sneakers in the dim-lit alleyway, slowly speeding up as adrenaline rushed through his veins. Max breathed heavily, warming up with the exercise of running. That's all he could do. Run. Run away from his house, his past, his school, and his memories.

Starting fresh sounding like heaven.

While lost in dreamland about getting out of this godforsaken town he lived in, He was soon stopped by a man in uniform. Max immediately froze, The red and blue lights igniting sheer panic. This is exactly what he feared, being taken back home, being hurt by the racist cops that littered the streets. He should of realized when the alleyway ended he would have had to find another secure route without being seen by these bastards.

"What are you doing out so late young man?" The older man said, shining his flashlight at the younger boy. Max squinted at the sudden bright light. He hesitated, biting his lip. "Are you listening?" He said, voice stern. Max looked up at him, shrugged, and stayed in place. The cop sighed in annoyance before leaning into his walkie talkie. "Yeah Chief, we got a missing boy over on Morningstar, gonna take him back to the station." He said, and Max cursed under his breath. He wasn't even out for 5 minutes.

Max hopped into the backseat, relived by the warmth of the heater blowing on his face. His hair fringed with the dry air, puffing out more than usual. The ride was silent, light music buzzing on the radio, but not loud enough for him to tell what was playing. The 2 minutes of silence gave Max just enough time to scheme, to continue his plan. Maybe he wouldn't be put back home, but could be put in foster care. It wasn't ideal, but it might just be his best shot.

Tomorrow might just be better and new, tomorrow may be the start of a new beginning. Today he learned this is what he needed, to run away from his problems.

Today he knew how to save himself.

* * *

 

Max stared at the rising sun, already dressed to avoid getting yelled at by his mother. He slipped his backpack over his shoulders and trudged to school, fixing a cup of coffee on the way out. The birds chirped and the orange sunrise faded to a light morning blue. Max's teal eyes shined in the early light while sipping the hot and bitter drink he came accustomed to. It was almost calming, but he knew nothing about this town was calm. 

He tossed his hood over his messy black hair, downing the rest of the coffee before entering the elementary school he went to. Screams from the obnoxious kids erupted throughout the cafeteria, followed by teachers scolding said kids. Max shoved his empty mug in his back pack before sitting down at a vacant table. Nobody paid him any attention, but he was used to that. He sat in silence until the bell rang.

His school day consisted of the usual: regular work, skipping lunch, and throwing rocks at random kids without being seen at recess. Nobody ever hung out with Max, he had no friends.

It was bliss.

Once the dismissal bell rang, All the kids began hopping into their cars, on their bikes, or filing on the bus. Max enjoyed the weather on his walk home, listening to the kids laugh. They must have it easy. 

Max expected his mom to be at work when he got home, so he didn't really worry about being insulted for no reason. While deep in thought, He was interrupted with a violent push that sent him on his hands and knees. The laugh from behind him was snarky and aggravating, and Max scowled. He pushed himself up, dusting himself off before facing the red-head. "What the fuck, Pikeman?!" Max yelled, shoving his hands into his pockets.

The pizza faced teen smiled, showing off his braces. Max visibly cringed with disgust. "Ah, Maxine, You might want to cool it with the language." Edward said, crossing his arms in a teasing manner.

Max turned around and kept walking. "Suck a dick, commie. Stop spending your time picking on 10 year olds and buy some fucking proactive." he said, stomping away angrily. The rocks that were thrown at him hit his backpack or the back of his head, but he barely felt it. When Edward didn't get a reaction, he began to get annoyed and impatient.

Edward turned toward his taller friend. "Petrol! Pin the girl, we'll teach her to ignore us." Pikeman shouted. Petrol began running towards Max, and while he made an attempt to run toward his house in the distance, Petrol had quickly pinned him to the ground. The minute Max hit the ground a shatter was heard from the inside of his backpack.

"Let me go, assholes! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Max screeched, kicking his tiny legs at Petrol.

Edward marched up to Max, squatting down to meet eye to eye level with the younger boy. "You don't want to disrespect a future army soldier, right Maxine?" Edward taunted, and Max visibly cringed.

"Like I'll ever respect you, you don't even respect me, and It's Max. Get your fucking pet off me, Pikeman, or next time I see you, you'll be dead." Max spat, spitting in his face. 

Edward wiped the spit off before silently telling Petrol to let go of Max. Once Max had stood, Edward threw a fast punch at him, knocking him back. "You will never learn, Maxine. You should know by now that nobody will give you mercy." Edward stated, before turning on his heel and marching off.

Max dusted himself off before angrily shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket, wiping small tears away with his shoulders before speeding off home.

Thank god his parent's cars were both missing, not wanted to deal with either of them. Max entered his house and kept the light off. He walked over to the kitchen, grabbed a bagged muffin, and marched upstairs.

He threw off his backpack and opened up the biggest pocket for today's homework and the destroyed mug. After pulling out the neutral colored folders and the shards of broken porcelain, he got up and shut his door, locking it just to be safe. He closed his curtains and turned on his bedroom light. 

He sat on the bed finishing the mediocre math sheet and reading a few pages of this dumb class novel, The Cats of Roxville Station, before shoving the completed work in his backpack. He knew his mom would bother him about it and if he didn't complete it his stepdad would hit him again.

Max stared at what was left of the mug on the floor, tiny bits hiding themselves in the carpet waiting to be stepped on later. Max kept his shoes on.

He picked up one of the pieces that looked sharper, curious if it would work or if he had to sneak another screwdriver. Max set the shard beside him and tugged off his hoodie.

 Line after line of endless regrets covered his forearms, from the wrist to his inner elbow. Shades of carmel, pink, and red were just the cuts. His upper arm and some parts of his forearms were bruised from being tugged, all dark brown and purple in some spots.

Max sighed as he picked up the piece of his old mug, nothing special really. It was just a mug with the logo of his late father's old job. 

Max picked up the dirty and stained rag under his bed and put it under his arm. He readied the sharp part at one of the more healed areas he hadn't gone after yet, and roughly drew it across his skin. 

It did nothing but leave a baby scratch.

Max groaned before throwing away the mug pieces. This was bullshit, a forced cut can't even do anything but he has a damn scar on the bottom of his foot from stepping on a tac? Bullshit.

Max begrudgingly grabbed his hoodie again, pulling it over his head before unlocking his door and dragging himself downstairs. 

He still saw nobody, but suspected his mom would be home soon, so he hurried to the garage to find a tiny screwdriver, or a hammer, whichever works.

Near the outside fridge that held all the alcohol, there was a tool box. Max silently celebrated to himself in victory, taking out a small screwdriver for tiny screws. He shoved it into his hoodie pocket before speeding upstairs again, eager to take the edge off.

He shut his door, forgetting to lock it, and stifled through his backpack for his handheld sharpener. He pulled it out and set to work with un-screwing the blade. There were stains from the last time he had cut, too lazy to wash them off. After the tiny screw came out, he picked up the plastic holder and the screw and set them on his nightstand.

He looked down at the metal blade with dissappoinment, feeling as if it was the first time he had done it. It came to this? To cut open my skin and watch as the life slowly fade out of me?

These thoughts flooded Max's mind as his shaking hand readied at the same place the porcelain couldn't cut through.

He pressed and dragged it across quickly, the little sting of pain making him feel a little more human. The line of red dropped down his forearm, like flowers wilting in the garden. 

Max let his tears fall, knowing nobody was home just yet. Nobody could tell him he was acting like a baby, nobody could smack him and say "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about!" 

His tears fell down his chin and onto his hoodie, leaving dark blue droplets scattered all over. He knew that was a reminder he still could feel.

Max bit his lip as he angrily sliced another line into his carmel flesh. 

"Why do people target me?" Max whispered to himself.

"Why can't my parents love me?"

Another red line.

"Why does Pikeman hate me?"

Another slice.

"Why do people see me as Maxine instead of Max?" He said, lip quivering as he flipped the blade to the other hand, angrily slicing over and over until his hand shook so bad he dropped the stained blade on the ground.

Max sobbed quietly as he used the rag to attempt to clean up. There were still red patches and bleeding lines but those didn't matter.

He rolled his hoodie sleeves down over his indescrestion, wiping away the lingering tears on his face. He took some time to shove the red rag underneath his bed and fix the pencil sharpener, red stains dancing around the metal piece. 

He looked out the window and into the driveway to see if his mom was home yet, spotting a red Saturn pulling up. Max cursed under his breath, picking up the tiny screwdriver and hiding it in one of his drawers. He tugged off his shoes and socks, curling up under his blankets just in case his mom were to walk in.

Max stared at the wall, feeling numb. He wanted to do something about this endless cycle of regret, endless cycle of abuse.

A call from downstairs sent chills down his spine. "Max! Come down and unload these groceries!" His mom screamed, and Max sighed with relief. Nothing bad, at least.

He got up, avoiding the area the mug was, and made his way downstairs. There were Wal-Mart bags at the table with easy to make food, portable as well. Perfect. 

Max did as he was told, answering any excess questions his mom had for him. This day was a bit easier than most at least.

"So, Max, what happened to your eye?" His mom asked, looking at the purple area by Max's face. Max brought a hand up to his face. 

"Pikeman, again." He replied a bit quietly, standing on his tippy-toes to reach the shelf to put some granola bars.

"Okay, what did you do this time to antagonize him?" She crossed her arms and glared down at him. Max didn't look her in the eyes, heart thumping against his chest.

"Nothing, just walking home." He said, closing the cabinet. His mom sighed in annoyance.

"God, do you have to be so helpless?" His mom said, and Max lowered his head. "I don't know why you can't just man up and hit him back? Be useful for once and actually try to protect yourself, Cause I sure as hell won't. Jesus, you make me regret my teenage years.." His mom walked out of the room, and Max gripped his hoodie in anger.

Of course. Of-fucking-course! Yeah, he can't go a day without being needlessly insulted for not being good enough. 

This house is about as protecting as a saloon from the 1800's. His treatment would at least be better if he took off into the next town over.

And then inspiration struck, a metaphorical lightbulb shining over his head. He could just run away, and he was prepared! There was food he could pack, he had a nice amount of money in his wallet, and so far was low maintenance. There was alleyways littering the city, along with trails he could take to avoid getting caught. He could stay in the shadows so he'll be hidden pretty well. This just might work...

Max set to work, checking the clock for time. It was 5:47, and the sun sets at 8:00. He has more than enough time to pack up, maybe also to find a way to avoid his stepdad.

 

 This plan just might work.

 


	2. The Night I Set Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The title explains all, plus Max is my son and I love him I wish him the best

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: referenced emotional abuse, referenced physical abuse, referenced bullying, self harm, *dabs* depression, and dealing with foster care type shit. lets get this started.

 

Max dumped his backpack out, only grabbing some paper, a pencil, and his sharpener to pack back in. He grabbed his favorite, most comfortable shirts from his closet, along with a few pairs of jeans and sweatpants. He raced over to his shoes to put them back on, practically bouncing. He opened up his drawer, took the few pairs of boxers he owns, the screwdriver, and his wallet and shoved them all in his backpack. He grabbed his favorite bear, Mr. Honeynuts, and a clean rag to pack as well.

He crept downstairs, checking to see if his mom or stepdad were there. Max didn't know the time, but it couldn't be past 6:00. Luckily nobody was there, so he raced to the kitchen and grabbed as much as he could of the snacks found. Chips, Granola bars, bagged muffins, tiny boxes of cereal, juice boxes, candy, and some fruit snacks. After filling his pocket and arms with snacks, he raced upstairs quickly, making sure not to drop anything. He shoved those in their own pocket.

Finally, Max quickly went towards the bathroom to grab deodorant, his toothbrush, and some small portable toothpaste. Everything small was cheap, and their family tended to save their money. After packing everything, Max looked at the clock downstairs. Oh shit, it was only 6:15! His dad wouldn't be home until 7:30 and Max had to leave at dark, so he guessed that meant time to plan how he would make it out. 

Max cleaned up his room, setting his school work on his dresser, and grabbing a few extra things he would need, like extra socks, Band-Aids, and his blanket. It's like everything could fit in his damn backpack, but everything he owned was rather small, guess that's what happens when your mom is 5'2" and your dad is 5'9". Max was ten and only,, actually, he didn't really know how tall he was. But he guessed he was around 3'11" by now, all he knew was that he couldn't ride any of the big rides when he went to the carnival a couple weeks ago. 

Back to the point though, Max had already decided what he'd do, It was rather simple actually. He had 2 windows in his room, one that went to the front yard and one that went to the side yard, where Max could easily sneak out of the back fence and into the main alleyway where he walked to school. He could walk far, from having nothing to do when he was kicked out for talking back, or just how he memorized this town like a map after living there for 7 years.

Max was grinning and giddy that this plan  _just might work!_ But he was also well aware of the obstacles that only a skilled Russian spy could avoid, so he was with terms that he could go back home. All he could really do was hope his parents don't call the police when he leaves or if he doesn't get taken by the police. Basically, The police are his main obstacle he couldn't avoid. 

Still, he sat staring at the setting sun, listened to his drunken stepdad come home and yell at his mom, and when it was deemed night time? He jumped out the second story window and took off.

 

* * *

Max knew everything he was going to say once he got to the station, and had mentally prepared himself for everything he was gonna spill, still being able to steer clear of revealing the acts of self-harm just to dodge being locked up in the Behavioral Health building. He was prepared to stretch the truth just by a bit to leave this entire state behind him. The tiny building came into view, sitting next to the Rec and the middle school that Pikeman went to. He stepped out of the car, immediately getting hit by the wind. He rushed inside with the man standing next to him.

The man stood about 2 feet higher than him, short for a cop. His hair was slightly curly and dirty blonde, looking young still. Must be a new recruit. They walked up to the front desk, and the cop next to him and the woman at the front desk shared a few words Max really couldn't care about. He only tuned in to gather some other info he saw as important or necessary. First, the cop was Officer Jasper. Then, They said they were gonna look through reports of missing children to see if he was any of them. Afterwards, they said they would call CPS if he didn't match any of the kids so they could talk to him about why he was out late and if he wanted to go home or not.

It was almost magical, it seemed unreal. Sure, Max wondered what it was like to end up having the police put you through foster care, or what would happen when they took you up, but he thought this was a mere thought, a what-if. Still, Max sat in a tiny, comfortable room while he was having pictures put beside his face, and all were inconclusive. Max sat in the room while an officer looked through his backpack, checking for weapons or electronics. She lingered on staring at the pencil sharpener, but didn't question it.

Not even 15 minutes later, a woman with tan skin and brown-reddish hair walked in, wearing clothes that looked too comfy for her to be a business woman. She had a little tag on her shirt, but Max couldn't read it from how far away she stood. The lady walked over to Max and sat across from him, nodding at the cop to close the door to where it was just them.

She leaned her elbows on the table, still rendering Max unable to read the tag. "Hey kid, I'll be talking with you tonight, okay? My name is Gwen, what's yours?" She asked, looking at Max a bit impatiently, like she was ready to bail if Max put up any fight.

Max decided not to be stubborn and just to get everything over with. "Max." He said, looking down.

Gwen smiled. "Can you tell me why you were out so late, with a backpack no less?" She asked, obviously knowing what he was going to say.

Max looked at her. "I'm sure you already know, I'm the classic runaway." He said, crossing his arms. 

Gwen smirked. "You're pretty smart, do you mind if I ask a few basic questions so I could fill out this file? They already took your picture, I just need the basics."

Max nodded, and Gwen cleared her throat. "How old are you?"

"10."

"When's your birthday?"

"February 26."

"Are you a boy or a girl, I have to ask." She looked at him with a somewhat confused look on her face, and Max returned it.

"Uh, a boy." Max said, kind of hoping they wouldn't ask more about that.

"Okay, that's all I need. Now, I need to ask some personal questions, if that's alright." Gwen didn't wait for a reply, just flipped to the next page in her file. "Why did you run away from home?" 

Max hesitated to answer, but knew he couldn't escape the question. "My parents don't care, they insult me, I have to take care of myself, and my stepdad's a drunken piece of shit." Max said.

Gwen raises her eyebrows. "Well, that's pretty blunt. Can you tell me where you live, or where you ran away from?" She asked, obviously a bit more comfortable.

Max furrowed his eyebrows. "I don't know the exact address but it's somewhere on Painter, and I swear to god if I'm taken back you won't get what you would expect, they're excellent liars." He said, remembering all the fake "I love you"'s he had to endure.

Gwen nodded. "We'll take your word on that. Do you have any siblings?" She asked. Max shook his head. "Alright, do you take any medicine?"

Max shook his head. "I don't know if I need it or not though. I haven't been taken to a doctor since I got my shots for school in like, kindergarten." 

Gwen furrowed her eyebrows. "What school do you go to?" Max glared at her.

"Doesn't matter, I left my home in hopes I bail this city, or entire state for that matter. Can we just find out where I'm gonna go next, god damnit!" Max raised his voice, getting more annoyed by the minute.

Gwen glared back. "Listen up, I don't know where you're going after this. For as much as I know, your attitude could end you up in one of those Children's homes, which will be absolute hell." Gwen said, and Max shrunk in his seat.

"I just want to go to a better place.." Max said quietly, fiddling with his thumbs. He hoped to himself that he wouldn't start crying, Gwen had sounded just like his mom.

Gwen sighed, leaning back in her chair. "I'm sorry, kid. Hey, I think I know somebody who might want to take care of you, how about that?"  Gwen offers, and Max looked up.

"Are they nearby? I can't risk being found by my parents, or ratted out by those assholes at the middle school." Max said. He was at his patience limit, there was nothing to spare.

Gwen pinched the bridge of her nose. "No, in fact, he's out of state. I usually visit him for my summer job since I need that extra cash, so he lives pretty far from this hellhole."

Max looked up, he was sold at "out of state". So Max sat up. "I'm sold, when do we leave?" He said, borderline excited. A house! Out of state! Fuckin' finally!

Gwen stood up. "Since you are the kid I'm assigned to help as of now, it would have to be me who takes you there. It'll be a long drive, so you could probably catch a couple Z's on the way, you look like you need it." She reached to the lanyard on her neck with her name tag and keys. "Pack your shit, lets go." Gwen said, walking towards the doorway.

Max blinked in surprise. He hesitated getting up, staring at her in a comfortable but questionable silence. "Doesn't it take time to let whoever's fostering you get everything ready?? Why are we leaving now?" Max said, standing up and slinging his bag over his shoulder. He walked next to Gwen, Realizing just how tall she was. Gwen took out her phone from her pocket.

"He's been waiting to foster a kid, so I already know he's prepared. Plus he'll be so happy once I tell him...and done." She dragged out, then put her phone up. Everything is happening so fast, Max feels like he's gonna collapse. Gwen tells the cops what's happening, takes some time to let them in on his file, while Max has a small existential crisis. After however long that fucking took, Gwen returns and waits at the door patiently. 

The day it all starts begins here, The metaphorical 8-bit "start" button flashing in front of his little face. Everything past this point will change his life, for the better or for the worse, he has no idea. But what he does know is that wherever he ends up, it will be significantly better than here in one way or another. Whoever will take care of him signed up to be a parent and was ready to love a kid with little to no background check, so there's nothing to be scared of.

So why was he shaking?

Was it that this was all happening too fast? Was it the internal fear of his parents when the sun rises? Was it that he could've gotten this far, but will soon be dragged back by his thick, black curls?

Despite the questions that swimmed in his mind, Max took in a deep breath and made his way to Gwen's car. The cold air was refreshing, the stinging wind bringing him back to reality.

Everything will work out. He was certain.

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao fuck feelings am i right
> 
> haha
> 
> can you tell I have no idea how the process of being taken to a foster home is like 
> 
> also y'all might not know but i based the area and scenery on my own town so eyyy


	3. The Road Trip

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day-long drive, featuring coffee, donuts, and panic attacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: Referenced child abuse, referenced self-harm, transphobia, and misgendering
> 
> Plus crying yeet

...

...

..

Max blinked his eyes open, having spent 30 minutes staring at the back of his eyes. He didn't expect to be able to sleep anyway, despite how tired he felt. The thoughts of all the snarky remarks he could've made and all the jokes and insults he could've used came rushing in, and he groaned. Why did he have to play nice again? Oh, right, to make sure he didn't end up in a children's home. 

Gwen flicked her eyes to the mirror, looking at Max scowl. "Can't sleep?" She said, slightly bored. The road was void of traffic, lights from restaurants and gas stations lighting up the streets. Max sat up and sifted through his backpack for his money, and a muffin.

"No shit. Stop at that McDonalds, I need coffee." He pulled out his wallet, and grabbed a five. Gwen rolled her eyes before turning into the drive-in. He leaned over and handed Gwen the bill. "Black coffee. No sugar, no milk." He added, slightly annoyed. No more nice-guy, gonna act like the jaded asshole he truly was.

After hearing the bored greeting from the teen working at the drive in, Gwen ordered the coffee and handed it to Max, speeding off. He took turns chugging the bitter drink and taking bites of his muffin, throwing his trash out of the window. Even though he had just chugged his coffee, Max was still thoroughly exhausted. So many questions swam through his head as the buildings blurred by the frosted windows. No music played through the radio, leaving the two in an uncomfortable silence.

Red flashed on the stop light, and Gwen took this chance to dial David on her phone. She turned to Max, put a finger to her lips, and a cheerful voice piped up on the other line. "Hello Gwen!" He said, drawing out the vowels in 'Hello". Max visibly cringed. "What's up?" She set her phone down on her lap and continued driving. Speaker was on, to Max's displeasure.

"Hey, David. I'm actually calling to say...you're..um.." Gwen hesitated, biting her lip. "w-well-" She stuttered, unable to find the words to really describe this situation without making David convulse with excitement.

However, Max audibly groaned. "You're gonna be a foster parent to me!" Max half-yelled. Gwen shushed him violently before a loud gasp was heard on the other side. Gwen groaned and slumped her shoulders.

"Is that true Gwen! Am I gonna be a father!? Is it a boy or a girl, oh! What's their name!?" Questions filled the car and Max crossed his arms in annoyance. He wasn't gonna like this guy. Too cheerful, too happy. Max was too depressed for that.

Gwen glanced at the phone on her lap before returning her eyes to the road. "He's a boy named Max. We should be there tomorrow night if traffic decides to let up a little while passing through the bigger cities. I already had the money sent to your PayPal, so I advise that you spend tomorrow fixing up your guest room. I know you've already had your place searched from when you first applied to be a foster parent, but I'll be required to still do a once-over." The car slowed to the next red light. "Gotta go. See you tomorrow or in 2 days, just pray for less traffic." Gwen ended the call with David shouting goodbye's.

Max still scowled. Well, now some of his questions were answered. His caretaker was an optimistic man-child that sounded like a low-key serial killer. But, in the end, it would still be better than his birth parents. The thought of passing up this perfect opportunity was sophomoric.

The seats creaked as he drew his legs closer, wrapping his arms around his knees. The pain from the bruises and cuts stung, but he kept that to himself. Sharing time was over, and all he needed was to get through the ride and let his plan fall through.

With that in mind, Max was able to close his eyes and rest, lazily taking his blanket and teddy bear without thinking and resting his head onto his backpack, using his curls for shitty cushioning. 

* * *

 Light snores came from the backseat, leaving Gwen confused. The kid just had coffee, and he's asleep? Whatever, Gwen had needed to also stop for coffee; if she was going to efficiently stay up for 24 hours, she needed a boost. 

While waiting in the drive-thru line, Gwen's phone buzzed. An unknown number appeared on the screen, and she answered hesitantly. "Hello, This is Gwen." She said, trying not to let her voice waver.

"Yes I was calling about the boy you're taking to that man, David was it? Well, I'm calling just to inform you that his parents sent a report in and that they wish to speak with you. It may not be the same child, but what are the odds that two kids go missing in the same night?"

There it was. The parents of the little shit in the backseat. With a quick throat clearing, Gwen agreed to speak to the parents and why they had to be trialed for the custody of their son. A gruff voice spoke up on the other side. "Hello, is this Gwen? Is our daughter with you?" He spoke, and Gwen furrowed her eyebrows. Daughter? Must be a different kid. 

"Sorry sir, I have a boy with me, and he's asleep in the backseat. Sorry for your misunderstanding-" Gwen started, and a long groan of annoyance came from the man.

"Is Maxine pulling that 'boy' bullshit again? Listen, she says she's a boy, but her name is Maxine and not Maxwell. It's just a weird phase, so don't play her pity game." He huffed, leaving Gwen speechless.

She hung up the phone, grabbing her coffee and paying in silence as she processed this information. Max stirred in his sleep, and Gwen took hesitant sips of her coffee. Everything she just heard Max's dad say? All just evidence that Max wasn't safe at home. 

After turning up the radio, The rest of the night was spent listening to music.

* * *

Max refused to start a conversation, and could feel the tension radiating off of Gwen. Did she know something?

Rock music hummed on the radio, and sometimes the light crinkle of a wrapper from a granola bar Max kept eating more of. He was strangely hungry, but nothing filled him up. After 5 granola bars and 2 muffins, he gave up on trying.

Gwen gripped the steering wheel and put the pieces together. Nothing about Max was even remotely feminine, but I guess that's just him being 10. Sure, he was short, but a lot of kids are short. But she never expected his full name to be "Maxine".

The smaller boy was restless, antsy about the tension and needed to say something, anything. "So, how do you know this 'David' guy?" He said, with pretend interest.

Gwen jumped, startled out of thought. "Oh, David? He's my co-worker for my summer job."

Confused, Max squinted his eyes towards Gwen. "What, does Social Services not provide work in the summer? That's bullshit."

 She shrugged, slightly more comfortable. "I had the summer job first. David helped me get this job, and I decided to take my summer off for the Camp we work at."

"You work at a  _camp_?!" Max shreiked, smiling in disbelief.

Gwen glared over her shoulder, moving slowly with traffic. "I'll have you know that it wasn't my first choice. Hell, it wasn't even my last choice. But I'm glad I work there still, I would've never met David if I hadn't gotten the job." She smiled sheepishly.

"...I swear to fucking god are you dating David, Gwen-"

"No! No, we're like best friends kid!" Gwen stuttered, embarrassed. If she was honest, Gwen liked David. But there's no way Max is gonna know that. 

"Yeah, sure. Just no PDA when I'm in the room." Laughing, Max shook his head. 

And again, only music filled the confined space of the car.

* * *

 Listening to songs for hours gets boring, especially if it's depressing emo garbage. This conclusion, made by Max (of course), was made by the afternoon of the car ride. Mere small talk was shared between Gwen and Max, sometimes branching to jokes or arguments. Though the two were both cynical, Their interests varied drastically.

" _Holy shit!_ Can we listen to anything else besides Twenty One Pilots!?" Max yelled, angrily flailing his arms. Gwen honked at the traffic ahead of her.

"Now you want to insult my music?! Listen here you little shit-" Another argument began, rapidly throwing references and insults like they actually meant it. If this is what it was gonna be like for the next 9 hours, Gwen has to re-think her job choices.

Max growled. "God how fucking far does David live? Are we even out of state?!" The time was aggravating them both, as clearly shown. Gwen, however, was starting to feel anxious, which gladly kept her awake. Meanwhile, Max was cranky and ready to fight with anything that crosses his path.

What could calm him down? Gwen sure as hell didn't know, but his anger was really setting her on edge. Maybe he could hear about the call she had with his parents, and talk about what she heard them say. That might be best if he knew.

Sighing, Gwen started. "Look, Max, your parents reported you missing into the station." A sharp inhale was heard from the backseat. "They talked to me on the phone, and I heard your father-"

"He is _not_ my father. He is a douchebag who thinks he has the right to fuck my mom." Max grumbled, drawing his knees to his chest.

"Well, erm, Your stepdad? Well he told me something I feel is worth mentioning, you might know what I'm talking about.." Trailing off, She eyed Max through the mirror. His face was buried in his knees, shoulders bouncing.  If she listened carefully, faint sobs were muffled into his jeans. Heart rate? Immediately doubled.

"Oh shit! I'm sorry if its a sensitive topic, I'm not going to take you back there under any circumstance, and I will call you Maxwell and he/him pronouns, promise. Look, David won't be like them at all. He is very accepting for his own reasons, but I won't tell him." Rambling, hands sweaty, shaking, Gwen tried to calm him down. Mentioning the call was a huge mistake, fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck-

A sniff came from the backseat, followed with furious sleeves wiping away the tears. "I'm such a fucking baby. I swear to god if you don't keep that promise not to tell David I will slash your tires." Glaring daggers out the window, Max grumbled a hoarse response. Is he used to having to stop crying relatively quick?

By the sight of his eyes drooping, Gwen had known she tired him out. In 10 minutes, Max had clocked out of consciousness.

Leaving the rest of the night spent driving towards the small town that was Sleepy Peak, ready to drop Max off to a better home.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *dabs* I have no soul
> 
> also sorry for my lack of ability to write I'm like totally tired all the time and I never think tbh


	4. Moving In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why cant people just leave Max alone???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tw: implied self-harm, depressing thoughts

Hell seems closer to heaven than Sleepy Peak in Max's eyes, The feeling of sin was already seeping into his bones. Snow crunched under his sneakers, real snow, not hail or frost, but  _snow_. His previous home was too hot for snow, The last blizzard being 5 years ago. The sun peaked over the mountains dusting the horizon, leaving the morning sky a mix of pinks, oranges, and blue. A sinking feeling pooled at the pit of his stomach knowing the familiar feel of his past town. Hell is nicer than a repeat of history, leaving the curly haired boy with a train of thought that was stuck in a loop.

What he faced was a house by a forest, made of wood mind you, and a SUV messily parked in the gravel. The air smelled of pine, Most likely from the evergreens that scattered the area near the leafless birch trees. In all honesty, It was a breathtaking sight. There was a gravel road as well, curb-less concrete roads surrounded by forest, save for a couple of houses here and there. From what he had heard, this was a pretty small town. Their school combined middle and elementary school, with the high school having a seperate building. 

The town was quiet, wind blowing through the woods and nipping at his skin. Max followed behind Gwen quietly to the cabin's front door, staring at his shoes and pulling at the straps of his backpack. The door burst open, a happy man with auburn hair smiling widely standing in the doorway. Backing up, Max scowled with discontent. He was wearing a light green shirt with a dark green pine tree on the front, a fluffy brown winter jacket, and Power Rangers sweatpants. 

"Gwen! It's so nice to see you!" David says, crouching down to meet eye to eye level with Max. Refusing to make eye contact, Max glared at his shoes. "It's nice to meet you Max! I hope you can find my place to be a home you confide in, oh we'll just have so much fun!" David stood and ushered them both inside, The warmth from a fireplace filling the whole house. Max immediately went to search for his room.

Gwen plopped onto the couch, taking off her boots and stretching. Noticing the bags under her eyes, David frowned. "Did you not get any sleep? Here, stay here and rest before you head back, I don't mind." Grabbing a blanket from the closet, David assured Gwen as he pushed her down gently onto the couch. Gwen yawned, mumbling a 'thanks' before drifting off. Smiling, David placed a kiss to her forehead, draping the blanket over her sleeping form. 

Opening each door in the thin hallway, Max searched intently. He ended up in a room covered in blues, greys, and greens. A twin mattress lay in the corner of the room, fairy lights hanging overhead with stick-on stars covering the ceiling. A quilt and a grey fluffy blanket covered the bed, along with 5 pillows. Looked comfy enough, a bit extra though. The wood floor creaked under his red sneakers, leaving Max to take in the scenery. Succulents stood perched on the desk, and a lamp was lit up on top of his small dresser. David put this together in a day? Impressive, he had to admit.

Setting everything up, Max spent the rest 10 minutes unpacking and eating more food he had packed. He peeled off his shoes and threw them across the room before unceremoniously trudging to his bed, taking off his blue hoodie and jeans. It didn't take long for him to fall asleep in the mess of blankets and pillows.

* * *

David peaked his head into Max's room, seeing the small boy bundled up into his blankets. Smiling fondly, David shut the door. Both Gwen and Max asleep left David some time to buy school supplies and to sign him up for school, He was sure Gwen had told him he was 10? That would leave him in the 5th grade then. Slipping on his fluffy slippers and grabbing his keys, David decided to go down to the local CVS to grab pencils and notebooks. 

His next stop was Sleepy Peak Grade School, The combined elementary and middle school. I'm honestly gonna skip the entire process of signing this boy up for school cause I'm a lazy author who has no idea how that process goe, but I bet it's boring.

After figuring out his classes and getting his schedule down, David went back to his little cabin. Max watched his SUV pull up through the window, still half asleep. His tired eyes wandered to his arms, swollen thin lines grazing his wrists. Purple and yellow bruises danced on his skin, all signs that he was fucked up. He shrugged his hoodie on and blinked his old thoughts away, kicking the blankets away and making his way to the living room. Gwen was snoring on the couch, and David beamed down at him. All he could wonder is what was happening back in his old town, what everybody was thinking or if they even noticed he was gone. 

Max was a shadow, never noticed or acknowledged. His mom thought of him as a mistake, and his stepdad had thought of him as an obstacle. No matter where he was, life was always cruel and judging to him. Which is exactly why Max wasn't gonna be used to being paid attention to.

Max only blinked at him before searching for the kitchen. He found it, but to his demise, there was no coffee maker. What did this man drink?? All he needed was bitter, hot, and awakening caffeine.

"What are you looking for? Are you hungry?" David asked from the doorway, startling Max. "Oh! Didn't mean to scare you, Max." Laughing, David apologized. 

"You don't have a coffee maker? Do you run on being obnoxious alone?" Stuffing his small hands into his pocket, Max pushes past David with a scowl on his face. Frowning, David looked down at Max walking off.

Maybe this isn't going to be as easy as he thought.

 

* * *

 

 Meanwhile, back at Max's old house...

Another bottle was chugged down, one after another. Evan never quit, did he? Valentine sobbed again, burying her head in her hands. Evan shot her a glare.

"Will you quit it with the waterworks? You didn't even love her!" He shouted, angrily finishing off the bottle. Valentine glared back.

"I did love  _him,_ Evan. I just wanted him to be strong, like his father. Sure I said some rough things, but he was my son!" She shouted, years streaming down her face. 

"Tsk. I didn't love her. She was a pain in the ass, always arguing and being a little shit. She'll know soon enough that wherever she ends up will be worse, and she'll really get it once she comes back." Evan grumbled, leaving Valentine sobbing again.

Her mistakes could not be reversed. Apology's wouldn't be enough for what she had done, and Valentine was completely accepting of that. Getting pregnant as a teen and not being prepared to be a parent proved her wrong doing's, now knowing that if she had the chance to try again, she would show her kid love. Max was just a practice round, and she failed.

Evan grabbed another bottle off the shelf.

* * *

Back to Sleepy Peak

Nikki kicked down Neil's door, smiling widely. Neil screamed, drawing his blanket to his face before peaking out to Nikki with a glare.

"How the fuck did you get into my house?!" Neil shrieked, confusion furrowed all over his face. Nikki smirked.

"There's a new kid in town, just saw a social worker take him, or her I couldn't really tell, into David's house." Still smiling, Nikki explained the new kid to her Best friend.

Groaning, Neil kicked his legs over the side of the bed. "Poor kid, having to deal with David. Pretty unfortunate." 

"I wouldn't say unfortunate, but he's definitely having a bad fortune, or bad luck." Nikki said, leaving Neil staring at her unimpressed. Heaving a sigh, Neil put on his shoes and fluffy jacket, knowing he wouldn't escape Nikki trying to break into David's house again.

So, with that, The two kids jumped onto their bikes and pedaled off towards the woods and for David's cabin to great the new kid. Fucking waste of a Saturday, it was too cold to even be outside, and the snow was slowing down their bikes. Whatever, Nikki doesn't give up. 

* * *

 

David watched the water steam on the stove before gently putting in the tea packet. He took the hot tea and set it on the counter, grabbing the sugar and milk. Even though he didn't have coffee, it couldn't hurt to try to get into the healthiness of tea! Maybe it'll even make him cheer up a bit!

Once dumping a quarter of the bag of sugar (lmao 'healthy' my ass) and some milk into the cup of peppermint tea, David walked over to the table and set it down neatly. While he was on his way to get Max from the living room, his door was quickly kicked down. David shrieked, and Max rose an eyebrow at the intruder. To Max, a girl about the same height as him with teal, curly hair put up into pigtails wearing a fluffy red jacket, dark blue jeans, black suspenders, and a grey shirt that read "fight me" stood in a stance that indicated she was, in fact, ready to fight. Nikki burst had through the door, with Neil trailing behind her.

"Gosh darn it, Nikki! I just got that door fixed!" David said, disappointed. Nikki stared straight at Max, practically jumping up to him. Instinctively, Max backed away immediately. David put a hand on her shoulder to try and pull her away, but she swatted his hand off.

"Sup, new kid! I'm Nikki, That's Neil, and what's your name?" She said excitedly. It had been ages since there were any new people in Sleepy Peak. Hesitantly, Max scrunched up into his hoodie. 

"Max. Is everybody gonna fuckin' do this?" Max said, looking at David with an annoyed expression. David pointed a finger at the young boy.

"Language, Max." He turned to Nikki and Neil. "I was just making some tea, would you guys like some? It's awfully cold today, I spent the morning buying school supplies and enrolling Max in school. He'll be in the same grade as you, Nikki!" Max left the room after hearing 'school', completely ignoring the idea of tea. Shaking her head in protest, Nikki followed Max, Neil doing just the same.

Sitting on his bed poking at his black eye, Max counted the fairy lights on his ceiling. "How'd you get that? You like to fight!?" Nikki said, plopping down next to Max. Startled, Max hit the wall beside him before turning to the green-haired girl. He subconsciously pulled down his sleeves and drew his legs to his chest.

"Why the fuck do you even care?! It's none of your business!" Moving further away, Max scowled at Nikki, whose red jacket was now tied around her waist. He took a second to look at Neil, who was wearing dark blue jeans like Nikki and a dark grey turtleneck with rolled-up sleeves. While taking a closer look at both of them, Nikki had some scrapes on her face with a Band-Aid messily pressed on one side. Neil's face had faint freckles dusting his cheeks and a slight creep-stache. 

Neil glared at him. "Who pissed in your cheerios this morning? Goddamn, we literally just met!"

"I have a right! It's not like you have to talk to me, just your life is so fucking lonely that you break into someone's house to meet a kid you could've just waited until Monday to meet in the first place!" Flailing his arms angrily, Max yelled at the stranger sitting in his new room. Neil blinked.

"Your voice gets super high pitched when you scream, why don't you simmer down?" Neil said, chuckling at his use of a meme correctly. Groaning, Max buried his face into a pillow.

Maybe he should've just taken advantage of not being paid attention to. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao why do I do this, this is so self-indulgent
> 
> also you can tell where my brain went to mush. After this chapter, I wont be writing for each day in the story's time. Ill be skipping days and speeding shit up so i can start writing Max being dysphoric and there being maxpres and shit so yeah


	5. New Kid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max attends school and isn't surprised at how the people act around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so maxpres starts next chapter ayyyyy  
> tw: referenced self-harm and hella bad depression
> 
> also i sorta changed the ourfits for the characters so they aren't wearing the Camp Campbell shit, cause this is school and shit.

The trees whipped by the windows, slowly decreasing in amount as they drive towards the school grounds. The place was fucking huge, no surprise for a grade school. Max refused to wear his seatbelt, chilling in the front seat despite David's protests. 

Once they rounded to the curb, David handed Max his schedule (Max still wondered why he would even have a schedule considering he never needed one in his old school) and dropped him off at the entrance. Crowds of kids of all different ages filed unorderly into the school building, parking their bikes, scooters, and skateboards at the rack up front.

Pulling his hoodie over his curls, Max hung his head while he walked into the building. Ignoring the teacher who greeted him at the door, He looked around the cafeteria he was immediately greeted with when walking in, much like his old school. Circular tables, tall tables, and weird uncomfortable furniture littered the giant cafeteria, obviously just for the middle school group.

Neil sat alone at one of the couches, playing on his phone. Max walked up to him, not sure what to do. Unsure, Max crept up behind him and startled Neil, and he raised an eyebrow at Max. "Aren't you in 5th grade? You should be in the gym with the elementary schoolers." Neil questioned, staring at Max before his face lit up. "Oh! I guess you don't know where that is." Sighing, Neil grabbed his bag and stood up. "Here, I'll show you. Follow me."

Max trailed behind Neil as he walked across the cafeteria and through big doors that read "Fine Arts Hallway", and walked down the entire hallway until they reached a door that lead into a huge gym. Very small kids and fairly tall kids were scattered into groups around the huge gym, some being heard on the other side of some bleachers that sat in the center of the gym. Nikki, sitting by the bleachers with a few other kids, came bouncing towards them. 

"Hi Max! Bye Neil!" Nikki yelled, taking Max by the wrist and pulling him towards her friends. Scowling, Max kept his other hand to pull his hoodie down further. The tugging on his left wrist stung, and a harsh pull made it feel like something snapped. 

_"Maxine!" My stepfather yelled, harshly grabbing my wrist and pull me to face him. Scowling in response seemed to only make it worse, as he twisted my arm while dragging me up the stairs, spewing pernicious words I blocked out for my own good. I tried to pull away, but he grabbed my hair, and I let out a shriek. "What did I say about midnight snacks! You're already fat as fuck, stop trying to eat all of my snacks you bitch!"  With a swift movement, My body was raised off the ground, hitting my bed frame rather painfully. I cursed under my breath flipping off the douchebag as he slammed my door. I looked at the bruise forming quickly around my arm, trying my hardest not to cry._

_Stay strong. Dad didn't die for me to act like such a pussy._

"Max?"

He blinked out of his memory, realizing he was just staring at his wrist. With a cough, Max tugged down his sleeve, staring at Nikki and the other kids around him, staring intently. "What?" He said, raising his head more. The bruise by his left eye was very visible now, and a few of the kids stared even more.

Nikki smiled again, gesturing towards the kids around him. One kid had a small puff of hair on his head while the rest was buzzed. Little freckles sprinkled his face, and he was wearing blue mittens, blue boots, a grey puffy bomber jacket with star pins, dark grey sweatpants, and a white shirt with the NASA logo on the front.

Another kid was short with a black combed undercut, a dark brown long-sleeved shirt, a beige vest, dark brown pants, and black boots. The other kid was pretty big, wearing a torn skull shirt with a black-long sleeved shirt underneath, dark red jeans, and black converse. He had loads of freckles on his face, along with fluffy red hair and lime-green eyes. 

Nikki gestured towards the three. "Max, This is Space Kid, Dolph, and Nurf! We all went to summer camp together, that's how I know David!" She said, proudly standing. Max looked down at his schedule.

"Why do we have schedules? We just go to the same classroom, then gym, then lunch, then recess, and then we go home. It's not like we have multiple classes." He grumbled, and Dolph raised his hand.

"Mein art classes are another class! Did you not sign up for an elective?" Dolph said, and Max squinted at his accent. 

"Of course he didn't, you idiot! He's the new kid, remember? Besides, people don't have to conform to societal norms like the rest of you losers." Nurf said, Punching him in the shoulder. Space Kid raised his hand.

"I take astronomy! You can sign up for extra classes too, Max!" He said, voice nasally and cheerful.

Nikki started to shake Max. "Also we get to have gym with the 6th graders, So we get to hang out with Neil, Preston, and the Magic couple!" Giggling, Nikki smirked. Snatching his schedule, Nikki gasped. "Oh hey, we both have Mrs. Jen! She's a bit weird, but you'll continue to have an A in her class if you just tell her she's pretty."

The bell rang, and Nikki groaned, complained about how she didn't get to prank some kids. Tuning her out, Max quietly thought of how different it is here.

'I never dealt with people caring about me or even pretending they care since Dad was alive.' Closing his eyes, Max was sucked into the world of his horrible thoughts.

'Everything will be back to like it used to be in about a week. Neil and Nikki will forget about me and David will snap from how terrible I am. They're all just pretending, nothing I'm enduring is  _real._ '

Walking into the designated classroom, Who he presumed to be Mrs. Jen looked up at him. She literally just looked like Gwen with a different color pallette, giving off a cult leader vibe.

"Good morning Mrs. Jen! I love your hair today!" Nikki said, and Mrs. Jen smiled.

"Why thank you, Nikki!" She said, and Max quickly complimented her, and she stared at him again. "Oh, you must be the new student!"

Guiding Max to the front of the class, Mrs. Jen clapped her hands to get everyone's attention. "Now class, We have a new student today! Introduce yourself!" She walked back to her desk.

Clearing his throat, Max deepened his voice a little more. "Uh, I'm Max. Don't talk to me, I dont really care." He said, walking to the empty desk at the back of the room.

Kids gave him strange stares, and Mrs. Jen decided to start class at that.

All Max did was avoid eye contact and insult the random kids at his table. 

* * *

 

Max walked into the boy's locker room for gym, confused about having to dress out. Nobody told him he would need clothes, so Max just walked out of the locker room before Neil grabbed his hood.

"You need to get dressed or else Coach will get mad!" Max turned toward Neil with a glare, slapping his hand off before continuing towards the gym.

Eyes burned into the back of his head, he could definitely feel somebody look at him. Looking up, a tall boy with fluffy, dark brown hair was staring at Max with concern. His eyes were a bright hazel, and unlike the other kids, he was wearing knee-high black boots instead of sneakers.

He immediately thought of that kid when a rose fell out of his locker, asking him to meet him in the back of the stage.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Preston eyyyyyyy
> 
> You can tell I rushed this so sorry if there's typos


	6. Theater Kid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One of the kids at school are more perceiving, which nearly scares Max to death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And the early stages of maxpres begin
> 
> tw: self-harm, crying, abuse mention, depressing thoughts

Lockers weren't allowed at his old school because some kids had hid drugs in them, so Max wasn't really used to opening lockers. But once he did mange to break it open, a plastic rose with a note fell out and onto the floor. Sighing, Max picked it up to read the note.

'Can you meet me in the theater room after school? -Perceiver' Max scrunched up his note before harshly slamming his locker. He ripped off the note and threw the rose in the trash.

'Miss me with that gay shit..' Thought Max, heading over to the Fine Arts Hallway. He knew the theater room was close to the doors, so it wasn't difficult to find it. The door was propped open, and the kid he saw at gym sat in one of the movie-theater-esque chairs. He was sitting with his long legs drawn to his chest, now dressed in normal clothes. The black boots remained, but were now accompanied with blue skinny jeans and a black hoodie with a gold star in the center, a silhouette of a man inside of it. 

His hazel eyes found teal eyes, a bored Max awkwardly leaning in the doorway. The boy stood up immediately, walking over to Max and putting out his hand to shake. Making direct contact, Max didn't accept, leaving the tall kid awkwardly putting his hand back down.

"Sorry, Uh, Hey. I'm Preston, and I wanted to talk to you about something." The boy, Preston, said. He closed the door and ushered Max into the room. Preston cleared his throat, looking Max in the eyes. "Are you safe at home?" He asked.

Max blinked with wide eyes. "Uh yeah my day is great, thanks for asking. Love how you asked me for my name first, but you don't look like a first impressions kind-of-guy." Sarcastically, Max rolled his eyes. Preston frowned.

"I saw the bruise, and I thought something horrible had happened-" 

"I'm  _fine_ , Preston. You couldn't have asked anywhere else? You don't even know who I am, No need for false concern." Max growled, angrily moving toward the door. Before he could leave, Preston grabbed his wrist.

"Just know you can talk to me if anything's hurting you. And sorry I didn't ask, what's your name?" Preston said, gently. His grip was tight, his nails digging into the already abused cuts on his wrist, the added pressure hurting his bruise even worse. Max tried to free his hand, but Preston's grip only tighten. He grit his teeth to prevent whimpering.

"It's Max." He strained, feeling the tear of skin on his wrist again. He never had time to check what had happened this morning, but the idea scared him. Preston glanced down at Max, noticing his struggle. He let go of his arm, quickly leading Max to pull down his sleeve and rub his wrist.

Dots of red spotted Preston's palm, and he immediately looked at Max. Obviously scared he had found out his acts of sin, his heart beat loudly in his ears. Before Preston could say an apology, Max sprinted out of the room and through the front door, climbing into David's SUV.

That interaction answered none of Preston's questioned, only raising more. 

* * *

 

Max didn't say anything on the ride home, immediately going to his room and slamming the door. He took this as his chance to check the damage, rolling up his sleeve and gasping at the sight.

Dried blood was splattered over a bruise ring around his wrist. Cursing under his breath, Max grabbed his rag and cleaned up the mess. 

Why did Preston care? He barely knows Max, so why does he even try to pretend to like him??

Max looked at the dirty rag, and then his wrist. His teal eyes traveled to his dresser, and the lone sharpener sitting there. 

"Why do people even try anymore? They should all just come to terms that I'm useless." Max grumbled, quickly unscrewing the blade, ignoring the fallen screw.

He held it to his wrist, angrily swiping. Years of being neglected was all he was used to, not being shown care or interest. 

Thoughts of negativity swarmed his mind, each thought ending in a fierce swipe of the small blade. Choking back tears, Max noticed his blood drip onto his jeans.

"Shit!-" Max cursed under his breath, quickly grabbing the rag and pressing it against his wound. 

Barely anything changed, huh?

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my boys
> 
> I know this chapter was short but it was exclusively for the first Preston and Max interaction and the angst.
> 
> next chapter will be developing maxpres and holiday mentions, like Christmas and new years


	7. Maybe I Was Wrong About You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max feels as if the kids hanging around him aren't lying when they say they care, for once he might trust somebody.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Developing MaxPres? Nerrisson on the side? Gay children? What more do I have to say?
> 
> tw: depression, referenced self-harm, implied domestic abuse, physical abuse, panic attacks, nosebleeds, misgendering, extreme gay and adorableness you might explode, i will explode

**The weekend after the first week of school..**

Max never had a bike, he didn't really need one since he could walk far distances very easily. However, Nikki and Neil had bikes so David  _obviously_ had to get a bike for Max as well, feeling as if he was upset the other kids had bikes and he didn't.

Since it was December, a bike was the first thing David had bought for Max. He had spent his time making sure to pay attention to what he liked and what some of the other kids liked as well, since their parents don't do much for their kids. Since the failed Parents Day of camp last year, David knows about what these kids lives are like and swore to protect them and love them 'til the end of time.

Max stared at his red and black shoes as they crunch over the snow covered forest, eyebrows knit in frustration and shoulders hunched. Screaming broke the tranquility of the forest, Nikki climbing the leafless Birch and Oak trees, Neil studying the Poplars and spewing random facts, and Preston admiring the Evergreens dusting the area. At lunch they had all decided to hang out and walk around town to show Max the most important places, but Max only allowed the 3 people he actually knew to come with. 

Every once in a while, Preston would walk next to Max and hum or sing songs from a plethora of musicals lightly, and other times he would break out rapping while he blasted music from his phone. The symbol of his hoodie was apparently for the musical  _Hamilton_ , One of Preston's personal favorites. 

Feeling somebody tap his shoulder, Max looked up at a slightly concerned Preston looking down at him. "Is something bothering you, Max?" He asked, resting his hand on the small boy's shoulder.

Shrugging off his hand, Max continued to walk. "'M fine. Why did we even do this again, it's freezing." Pulling up his hoodie, Max stomped away. Raising an eyebrow, Preston continued to walk beside Max.

"You not used to cold weather? Where did you even live before you came here?" Preston mocked Max's pose, shoving his hands into his hoodie pocket and twirling his thumbs. Max eased up a little, but soon enough he frowned again.

"My old town was a shithole. Hot, flat, boring, and small. Though it actually had more than one elementary school and separate middle schools, so not as small as Sleepy Peak I guess."

"So I'm guessing, Maybe Arizona? somewhere around there?" 

Max chuckled a little, letting his smile linger while he spoke. "Close. Texas, up north. Haven't actually seen snow since 2012." His smile was warm, traces of nostalgia gleaming in his eyes. He dropped his smile soon, features softening up. "I remember when in the beginning of the year, my dad and I built snowmen together. Mine was extra small, and he had taken one of my mom's sari's and put it on my snowman, giving me it afterwards to keep. I haven't ever worn it since that day."

Neil and Nikki watched Max smile and tell old stories that never went past 2012. Listening intently, Preston took in every word, smiling softly. Gasping, Nikki almost shrieked at the sight before Neil hurriedly covered her mouth, drawing it back in disgust. "Did you just  _lick_ me?!" He whisper-shouted. Nikki smiled widely and jumped out of the tree her and Neil were relaxing on. 

"I'm sorta happy for them. Cause ya know Preston and Nurf and all that drama and how Max is the 'blah blah blah I'm so emo I don't like anybody' type of guy? They fit in so perfectly and honestly I've never been happier to see domestic gay being born."

"Nikki, shut the fuck up oh my god.." 

After some joke was thrown into the conversation, Max looked at Preston's hoodie again. "Oh, yeah, You said your hoodie is from a musical? What musical again though? I forgot." Preston stood tall again, throwing his gay arm up in a dramatic and enthusiastic fashion.

"Hamilton, One of favorites along with Les Mis, Heathers, Be More Chill, and Dear Evan Hansen. I highly recommend it!" Talking about the basic summary of Hamilton, Max stared at Preston's eyes. It seems unnatural for eyes to be yellow, not quite hazel but definitely yellow. They glinted in the sunlight peaking through the pine, and Max could not stop staring. "Max? Are you listening?"

Blinking, Max was pulled back into reality. "Oh, sorry. Do you wear contacts?" Max squinted at his eyes again, and Preston smirked.

"Nope. I have golden hazel eyes, naturally. You know, your eyes are a very pretty sea green." Preston said, Looking down at Max as the younger boy turned away in embarrassment.

"Yeah, whatever.."

* * *

** A week before Winter Break, at lunch.. **

 Two people Max had never seen before sat at his table, and when Neil and Preston saw them they groaned loudly in annoyance. One kid was wearing a dark red sweater with rolled-up sleeves and a black vest and tie, light brown curls going down to his mid-neck and wavy bangs nearly falling into his eyes. He had light green eyes that looked tired while his head rested on some kid's, Max couldn't really tell what their gender was, shoulder. 

The other kid had dark skin and dark red curls on top of their head with buzzed sides and back. Huge circular glasses stood perched on their nose, and sapphire eyes were reading a huge book. Silver braces covered their teeth, and a maroon hoodie with, like the other boy, rolled-up sleeves. Cards and dice were neatly set up in front of them, and little peach, fake elf ears were attached to the genderless child.

Nikki bounced to the cards and sat down next to the kids. Neil growled and stomped over to them. "What the fuck, Nerris? Harrison? This is our table!" He stared at the kid presumed to be Nerris. They laughed, speaking with a lisp.

"I heard there's a new kid and I wondered if he wanted to play magic with me. Harrison and I both agree that he most likely wouldn't mind." Their voice was sort of high pitched, Nerris, upon further inspection, also had dark freckles dusting their cheeks. Max huffed, sitting down across from the kids.

"No." He said, propping his legs on the table. "I'm not up for the weeb shit." Preston laughed lightly, sitting down next to Max. Harrison looked up at Max and tiredly continued to rest his head on Nerris' shoulder.

He spoke in a light Polish accent. "But Magic is an American card game, how would that make Nerris a weeaboo?" Max glared daggers at the tired boy.

"It's lame nonetheless. I don't fucking waste my life getting engulfed in shit that doesn't exist."

Nerris gasped, standing up and grabbing a handful of their dice. "How  _dare_ you insult the fine art of role-playing and fantasy games!? You want a twenty-sided ass kicking, motherfucker?" They glared back at Max, holding up their hand threateningly. Max stood up as well, slamming his hands on the table.

"Your attack will be useless compared to it's rebound. Seriously, You wanna bust your ass looking for your dice on these floors? Go ahead, Try and fuck with me I dare you." Nikki smiled in enjoyment.

"Fight! Fight! Fight!" Nikki chanted, and Nerris threw their dice, hitting Max on the forehead and one of his eyes, 2 getting stuck in his hair. He growled, jumping towards Nerris and kicking them in the stomach, sending them backwards. Harrison stood and watched as Max threw a punch clean in their jaw, and Preston stepped towards the two as Nerris began to harshly pull Max's hair. 

Teachers sat back and ignored the fight, students soon gathering around and chanting the fight on. Nurf was obviously in the front row, and Preston cowered back, not wanted to get hurt by the excessive kicking and hitting. Multiple students were cheering for Nerris, and the rest for Max. Nurf was shouting to the two when they had a weak spot open, not helping the fight resolve. Sometime in the fight, Nerris had broken their glasses and Max had a piece of the broken lens in his hand shouting threats at Nerris.

"I  _dared_ you to fuck with me! Now see what happens? This is why we can't have nice things!" He yelled, aiming the lens at Nerris. They had their hands up, eyes squeezed shut.

"Ok, Ok! I'm all out of mana, You win ok!?" They yelled, and Max hopped off. All the kids soon started either going back to their seats or helping the fighters. Preston was asking Max if he was alright, Harrison was hugging Nerris and planting kisses to their forehead, and Neil was scolding Nikki for cheering them on in the first place. Nerris held their destroyed glasses and their hands and looked at Max. He looked down at her, emotions unwavering.

"Listen, Sorry about that. Just don't start fucking crying or else I'll-" Preston put a hand on Max's shoulder, shaking his head at him. Sighing, Max slumped back and pouted in annoyance.

Nerris smiled a little. "Sorry for throwing my dice at you, I just really love my fantasy games. D&D, Magic, Pokémon, etcetera. Truce?" Nerris put out their hand, and Max reluctantly shook it.

"Sure."

* * *

  **Christmas Eve..**

Preston, Max, Nikki, and Neil were all laying on David's roof, listening to light alternative rock. The Killers, American Authors, Halsey, Twenty-One Pilots, and One Republic rang out through Preston's phone, and Nikki broke the pleasant tranquility once again. "Are you guys excited for Christmas tomorrow? It's my favorite holiday!"

Neil sighed, closing his eyes. "No, Nikki. I'm Jewish, I don't celebrate Christmas." He said, and Nikki frowned.

"How about you Preston? Think you might spend this Christmas with Max, David, and I this year?" Max blinked, turning to Nikki with confusion.

"Uh, the fuck you mean? Break the damn door again and you'll have a lawsuit on your hands." Sitting up, Max continued. "Why can't you just spend Christmas with your parents anyway?" He grumbled, and Nikki shrugged.

"My dad doesn't live here anymore and my mom said she wants to save her money on her monthly phone payments and tequila. David gets some dope gifts though, So I just spend Christmas with him." Nikki sat up and rested one arm on her knee, wind blowing her pigtails back. Snow continued to fall, and Max sighed, falling back onto the roof.

"Wait, Max, why are you spending Christmas with David? What's up with your parents?" Preston asked, turning towards Max. 

Max squinted at Preston and gestured to the house they were laying on top of. "I live with that cheery bastard, My mom and stepdad are down in Texas and I'm being fostered by David."

Preston gasped, immediately springing up into a sitting position. "No fucking way! I honestly feel bad that you have to deal with that much positivity, but that would make an  _amazing_ plot for a play!" Preston dramatically yelled, immediately grabbing his phone and typing onto his Google Docs. "Yes! I'm on  _fire_! The passion, the angst, the resolution! Amazing!" His thumbs moved at top speed, Preston hyper focusing on his phone and his phone alone. 

Max growled, and with annoyance, slid off the roof and landed face-first into a pile of snow. The snow stung his black eye, and he hissed in pain, not noticing how direct impact to the ground from a rooftop to his face had caused some other damage until red starting dripping into the snow, staining its pureness. Max put a hand to his nose, hand covered in red when he drew it back.

Nikki peered over the roofs edge, seeing Max looking down at his hand with his back facing the gang. "Max? You shook my buckaroo?" She said, earning a grammar correction from Neil. Preston noticed that Max wasn't at his side and looked over the edge with Nikki, Neil joining in soon enough. All three of them jumped down, just to see if Max was alright. 

Dark red dripped down from both of his nostrils, but his nose wasn't broken. Still, Max's eyes were widened and he looked like he was somewhere else. His hand shook, and his breath sped up. 

_"What the fuck did you say to me, Maxine?!" Evan yelled, smashing his bottle against the wall. I cowered, ducking backwards and crashing into the back wall of my bedroom. I glared at this prick who dared to get glass in my fucking carpet._

_"I said fuck you, asshole! Get your alcoholic ass back to Tennessee or fucking off yourself so you'll be more useful you dick!" I yelled with all of my strength, feeling a numbing blow to my face. I fell back into the wall, collapsing onto the ground and holding my nose. Something about it felt wrong, out of place and disconnected. Blood oozed into my cupped hands, some dripping down into my mouth. I spit out the iron taste, before I was roughly pulled up by my bare arm._

_"You disrespectful little bitch! I provide the money that pays for you to even sleep under this roof and you treat me like this?! Guess you don't fucking deserve it! Come on you little shit!-" Evan growled, twisting my arm as he dragged me out of my room, down the stairs, and threw me out the back door. "Go sleep with the coyotes, whore!" He yelled, before slamming the door and locking it._

_I shakily stood before walking to the broken trampoline in the middle of the yard. Crawling under and curling up in the wet grass, I cried myself to sleep while my broken nose ached and throbbed. They don't care though, no matter how much I cry._

"Max!"

The shocked boy gasped, tears starting to fall down his caramel cheeks and mix with the blood still oozing from his nose, knocked out from the memory. A rack of sobs shaked his shoulders, and Preston put a hand on his shoulder. Immediately, Max flung himself at Preston, burying his face into his chest and gripping onto him for dear life, wheezing and sobbing, tears collecting on the fabric of Preston's hoodie. The two boys hugged onto each other and slowly sat on David's porch. 

Shushing Max and patting his hair, Preston reminded Max to breathe and held him close. Nikki and Neil gave them room, obviously lost on what to do in this situation, silently watching the new kid break down. 

"It's okay Max, I'm here. You aren't alone, breathe Max, Breathe." Preston whispered, allowing Max to breathe slower and to stop sobbing, tiredly resting his head against Preston's chest. He had politely turned his head to the side to make sure no blood got on Preston's hoodie, and he drew back and wiped away his tears in embarrassment.

"That never happened Preston.." Max stuttered, getting off of Preston's lap and picking at the dried blood on his face. Preston smiled nicely before nodding and standing up.

As the three went home for the day, Max sat back on his bed and smiled. Preston, Nikki, and Neil seemed to actually care, and he had never been happier to know that.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm falling in love with maxpres even though it was probably a crack ship
> 
> also I wrote all of this in a day so if there's mistakes, Just know I rushed this and was up writing for 11 hours (ok I also watched a movie and drew so I didn't actually use all that time writing but you get the point)
> 
> Also I love all of you sweet babies who leave amazing comments on my fic and all of you lovelies who leave kudos! I drew some art for inktober with my headcanon on how the characters would look so here:
> 
> https://lonelysail.tumblr.com/post/166619800307/lonelysail-i-decided-to-take-my-inktober-art-and


	8. Get Used to It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max still needs time to learn that things aren't the same anymore and that there's room to learn new things and experiences to endure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Christmas-Max's Birthday 
> 
> Holidays are different, Nikki is a wild wingman, Neil is embarrassed, and Preston is dramatic. 
> 
> tw: emotional abuse, physical abuse, depressive thoughts, excessive gay™

**Christmas..**

"Max get the hecc up!"

A heavy weight immediately crashed down onto Max's body, the younger boy being way too tired to process what the fuck was happening. When he opened his eyes and saw pink irises staring at him, he closed his eyes again and kicked the girl off his bed.

She fell back with an 'oof!' but soon stood back up and continued to shake the angry boy. After 10 solid minutes of Nikki screaming in his ear, Max groaned and sat up, slipping on his hoodie.

A knock at his door made him turn his head before realizing it was at the front door, and he lazily dragged himself to the living room. A small pine tree covered in fairy lights and hand-painted ornaments David and Max made together stood nicely in the corner of the room, a plethora of neatly wrapped presents sitting underneath. Preston sat at the small recliner, shouting ways David could've made the house look better.

"Pres could you, I don't know, tone it the fuck down? I have a headache." Max grumbled, earning a comment of displeasure from David about his foul language.

"Max, so nice of you to finally join us. Sleep well?" Preston said sarcastically.

"Fuck off." With a huff of annoyance, Max flopped into the couch and laid down. Preston and Nikki laughed at his pouting.

David stared at the three diverse children and smiled widely, an ugly Christmas sweater that looks hand-knit engulfing his slender frame. "Alright kids! Go grab one of your presents from under the tree!" David sing happily.

With a shriek of excitement from Nikki and a loud 'YES' from Preston, Max stayed put on the couch. David saw how tired he was and decided to grab a present for him, handing the medium-sized box to the smaller boy.

Wrapping paper was everywhere while Nikki tore open her present, a plush wolf being revealed. Preston gasped at the Les Mis poster, eyes full of stars. Max smirked at the coffee maker, heart warming knowing that he remembered his fondness for coffee.

A nice hour of laughing and screaming filled the small wood cabin, snow floating down from the skies outside. Nikki almost broke the Christmas tree, Preston started crying at the fully printed Be More Chill script, and Max nearly died inside when a bike his size was presented to him. He never even learned how to ride.

The stockings were saved for later since nobody wanted to deal with sugar high Nikki, and the extra gifts for their friends still lay under the tree. A few of, as David put it, campers stopped by to say hi to David and to get a few extra gifts.

Max's face hurt from smiling so much, especially when he received a mug that read "Nope" across the front. Never had he ever felt so appreciated, he had never even had a worthy Christmas he could remember.

Their holiday soon came to an end and, that night, Max could sleep knowing he had a good day.

 

* * *

 

**February 26, 2018: Max's birthday..**

When the lunch bell rang, Max didn't even hesitate to pass his lunchbox over to Nikki, who graciously snatched it. 

"Oh boy, David betta pack some cosmic bitches-" She stopped at the small note left in his lunch box.

_Happy birthday Max! Gwen called and told me today was your birthday so come right home after school, ok? Love you!_

Smiling widely, Nikki began to vigorously shake Max, who had his head down in the seat next to her. "Max! You didn't tell me it was your birthday!" The wild girl screeched, earning everybody's attention.

Groaning, Max shoved her off just as everybody started to talk.

"It's your birthday? Why didn't you say anything?" Neil said, looking at the grumpy child.

"Cause it's none of your business, God damn." At this point, Max's bruise on his face was finally gone but he still felt pain on the side of his face.

"I grant you my wizards amulet as your gift, Max!" The elf-child raised her 'amulet' out of their backpack and handed it to Max.

"Nerris, that's a tin can, and I don't want anything." Roughly smacking away the tin, he resumed trying to block out everybody else in the world. But everyone was persistent, but to Max it never even matters. Who cares if he's 11?

Somehow, I'm the back his mind, he remembers his mom's voice, her old talks about this time of age. She would always try to talk Max out of being a guy with the whole puberty talk, and that she started puberty at 11.

_"Honey look! It's my first sports bra, soon one day you'll fit into this!" She held up a blue sports bra, somewhat stretched with age. I crossed my arms._

_"I'm not a girl. I wanna start getting facial hair and a deeper voice like dad!" Angrily, I stared at my dumbfounded mother._

_"Maxine, you should be proud of being a woman. I understand that you like boys and all but being a boy as well would make you a-" I stomped my foot on the ground, raising my shoulders._

_"A what, mom? A faggot? Who cares if I'm gay, I'm not even completely gay! Girls are cute too, just I dont want to be one!" Tears brimmed at the corners of my eyes, my curls kept in the tight ponytail bouncing with my exaggerated expressions._

_A harsh smack rang across the silence, a buzzing feeling lingering on my face. My mom stared down at me, biting her lip angrily._

_"Don't you dare speak to your mother with that tone of voice young lady! I can ruin your life, you spoiled brat! Get out of my sight before I'm charged with murder!" She screeched, leaving me bolting to the upstairs bathroom._

_I stared at the ponytail, gritting my teeth as I ripped out the hair tie. Loose, black curls unfurled over my small shoulders, and I grabbed the scissors from the cabinet._ _Harshly hacking off strands of hair, the pieces fell into the sink unceremoniously. Sobbing, I cut it all off, until short, but fluffy, curls remained around my head._

_And I smiled, happy I finally looked like a boy._

His curls were longer now, but still short. They lapped over his ears and tickled his neck, parts falling into his eyes. It's been a year since he had cut his hair, but it takes forever to grow anyway. 

Max read David's dumb note Nikki gave him at the end of lunch, crumpling it up and throwing it in the garbage. Birthdays just mean hair cuts and getting closer to death, 2 things Max enjoyed, but he never really celebrated his birthday. It was never a personal thing, or a trauma related issue, but he never just saw the importance of it.

Max still walked home from school since he never learned how to ride his bike. Once he had rounded the corner towards the cabin entrance, Preston was pacing back and forth on his front porch. Usual neatly kept curls were now messy, his face was flushed red, and a folded piece of paper was being crumpled in his sweaty hands. 

"Are you okay?"

Preston shrieked, startled and high-pitched. Jumping about five feet backwards, Preston hit his back against the door. Wide hazel eyes stared down at teal once again, his lips pressed together in a fine line. Quickly, Preston handed Max the paper and bolted while screaming, "HEREYOUGOALRIGHTSEEYOUBYE!" Smiling, Max looked down at the note in his hands. Messy handwriting stared bullet holes into his soul.

**Max,**

**Can you hang out with me (just me don't bring anyone) after David gives you this weird cupcake he made for you? I know you need to learn how to ride your bike, or just don't bother to, so bring it plz. I have something important to tell you.**

**\- Preston, the ultra gay**

Max's heart began to race at what Preston might tell him, and he smiled wide at his little note at the end. His face flushed red with embarrassment, and he laughed at the note like it were Preston himself. Ever since the little incident on Christmas Eve, Max started to appreciate and recognize what made Preston special, what made him  _him._

Anyways, Max walked into the house still smiling. Though, a flash of auburn hair definitely made it go away. A chocolate cupcake with a single candle was in his hands, and David grinned as he handed it to Max. "Happy birthday, champ! Preston came by asking to hang out with you, so you can leave after you finish this little treat I made!" The candle was blown and the cupcake was devoured shortly after, still chewing as he grabbed his bike and waited at the front of the house.

Preston never gave an address.

Groaning, Max tossed his bike down onto the pavement and sat next to it. There goes his happy mood, but not even five minutes later, Preston came pedaling up to him. He panted for a minute, before shyly smiling down at him. "Didn't realize I never put the address. Lets go to the junkyard, there's tons of cool stuff there. I'll teach you how to ride your bike in the street nearby that nobody drives on anymore.

Sticking out his tongue, Max glared down at the bike. He didn't even really need it, couldn't he just walk?

"Something wrong?" The curly haired drama king asked. Max crossed his arms defiantly.

"Why do I have to learn? I don't feel like it."

Heaving a sigh, Preston pointed to the bars on his bike in the back. "Ugh, fine ok sure, but just hop on my pegs so we can get there faster." Hesitantly, Max put his hands on Preston's shoulders and balanced himself on the pegs, worried he would fall.

The minute Preston started pedaling, Max nearly shrieked and held on tightly to the giggling mess that was Preston. After a few minutes, Max was okay with the biting wind and finally had footing he was confident in. A few bumps in the road were no problem, in fact, Max enjoyed them. Easing off Preston to get a better view, Max took in the sight of the sunlight beaming through the trees slowly retaining their leaves.

Though it was still Winter, and it was fucking freezing, Spring was approaching fast. Flowers would already be blooming if it weren't for the frost that stubbornly clung to the grass like an annoying cousin. Even when they arrived to the junkyard Preston mentioned, all metal objects were unable to be touched for longer than 2 seconds. 

The small buzz of music hummed through Preston's pocket, bands Max has never even heard of that still lifted his soul and temporarily relieved his stress. Though not even wanting to sleep, Max was constantly tired. Music that reminded him of this only pushed that mental exhaustion, leaving a familiar emptiness blur his vision once again. Still, despite the increasing weight on his shoulders, Max looked up at the one thing he could smile for. 

The dark brown curls bounced just around his head, hazel eyes contrasting the dark hair in the first place. The cold turned his pale nose pink, a slight flustered blush dusting his cheeks. Curiosity returned when he thought about what Preston needed to say, as he clinged to the hope that he would-

"It's funny that I'm still older than you, but at least now you're 11, you'll get taller." A voice snapped Max out of thought, realizing they had made a lap around some of the junk littering the surrounding area. Chuckling, Preston continued. "At least soon your voice will deepen, getting real tired of that squeaky voice of yours."

Swiftly kicking Preston in the shin, He laughed along with the taller male. Smirking, Max glared at Preston. "My dad was 5'9, and my voice is deep for boys my age. Maybe as you get older you'll learn how to  _tone it the fuck down._ Seriously all you do is yell!" Still laughing, Preston lightly punched Max's shoulder. The two boys began to walk back to Max's cabin, Preston deciding to walk his bike so they could spend more time together.

"I'm honestly relieved you won't ever be taller than me to be honest."

**"Oh fuck off, All white men are taller than me, don't rub your privilege in."**

"What privilege comes with being tall? You short people can fit in small spaces and weave through crowds and shit."

**"Yeah, but y'all can reach the fucking top shelf and actually see in concerts, and get the beautiful and comfortable shot of being in the back of pictures and being seen."**

"Did you just say y'all?"

**"I SAID I was from Texas my dude, does sound just dissipate halfway on the way to your ears?"**

"What other slang do you even use? You just said 'my dude', you're like a walking shitpost."

**"Folk, I say 'soda' and not 'coke' for everything, hella-"**

"But hella is from California? Why would you use it?"

**"Ever heard of Life is Strange?"**

"Good point, good point."

**"Hella good point you mean."**

"I will punt you into the stratosphere, you gnome."

They play insulted and actively made decent casual conversation up to the point they had stopped in front of Max's house. Their smiles returned nervously, as Max was bouncing with curiosity, and Preston was bright red with nervousness. The clouds dotted white over orange and pink, dark blue adorning the top of the sky and ultimately the moon was shining down on the two.

Max nervously fidgeted with his hands inside of his pocket, bouncing from foot to foot. Already setting up to pedal away, Preston sat on his bike and motioned Max over. He had continued to usher him closer, until they could feel the puff of hot air that was visible in the cold. Preston smiled down at Max. "I had a different idea of how to say Happy Birthday, but since I like to be expressive and cliché my present to you could go either way."

Silence.

Then everything was magic.

Fire bubbled in the pits of their stomachs, Eyes wide with surprise and lips sealed with connection. Max's heart beat was the rhythm and Preston's was a fast and steady beat, together they combined into the perfect wall of sound. Though unexperienced and rushed, The romance that Max experienced was everything he could've ever asked for.

And with a nervous laugh and pedaling away quickly, Preston yelled, "Tell God I'm fucking gay!" Leaving a flustered and happy Max standing in front of his foster dad's cabin. His face was adorned nicely with bright red, usually unnoticeable until this moment. 

And to end the day, Max wobbled into his room with legs made of jelly, a giggling mess as he didn't sleep while thinking of Preston.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that Max is 11, time to start writing in that weird puberty stuff (ew)
> 
> ALSO!! MAXPRES IS IN ACTION AND GAYER THAN EVER!
> 
> Also Max always has a packed lunch and I'll be writing in more Gwenvid and David in general yeet
> 
> I appreciate all of your lovely messages and I hope you all have a wonderful day!
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/user/macaronidaddy/playlist/1YLFHI42NsZ7Myngx081IY <\- Preston's playlist


	9. Trust Issues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max believes he can confide in his foster dad with what was going to happen sooner or later, but he ends up being more correct than he hoped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Max begins to develop, The boyo goes to camp in the summer (Briefly written in, not gonna dwell on the camp part too much), and Max is bi with a gay af boyfriend. 
> 
> tw: Dysphoria, Self-harm, suicidal thoughts, panic attacks, depressive episodes, and f-slur
> 
> This is the chapter where I decided to add extra tags in the entire work oops

** Sometime in May, At night.. **

 Steam still fogged up the mirror, and with a quick swipe, Max could see his face. He dried his hair and body, but before he could wrap the towel around his waist, Something about his reflection seemed off. He stared at his chest, noticing the fat that was gaining around them. He turned to the side, and furrowed his eyebrows. Jumping up and down a little, his suspitions were confirmed when they flopped up and down (painfully) with him.

If his mother could see him now, all she'd do is pester him with bras or all that bullshit. Growing up, He had known he would gain a similar body to his mother. Her boobs weren't too big, B cup probably, but her hips were wide. Though he had expected these days to come, he had just hoped they would be delayed a little longer. Nobody would even recognize him as a boy if he were to have bonkers and hips that don't lie.

Sighing, Max wrapped the towel around his chest as well, feeling worse than he had felt in a while. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyelids, even after he had slipped on a loose t-shirt, those monstrosities still were prominent on his chest. Why wasn't he aware of this? When did this fucking happen?

Max curled up on his bed, dread pooling up in his stomach as his worries flooded his mind. _Would Preston break up with me if he found out? Is David just going to send me away? Is this gonna be a repeat with those fascist assholes?! What do I do, Only Gwen knows about this-_

Springing out of bed, Max didn't even bother to tug on his hoodie and he bolted out to the living room. David looked up at the younger boy as he looked around for the house phone, immediately speeding towards it before stopping. mumbling a 'shit', Max bolted to David's room to look through the foster care papers in hope of finding Gwen's number.

With a quilt almost identical to the one in Max's room hanging loosely over his shoulders, David peeked into his own room to find the younger boy tearing through papers frantically. Peppermint tea steamed in a nice little mug, setting it down before squinting at the tiny gremlin.

"Max? What are you doing?" David said, slightly concerned. Not even looking up, Max continued to sift through papers. Frustrated, Max let out a groan.

"What the fuck is Gwen's number?! Shit, ughhhh-" He groaned, until the metaphorical lightbulb shined over his head as he turned to David. "David! Gwens number, I need it!" He impatiently stood in front of David, hunching his back to hide his problem.  

Smiling sweetly, David put his hands on his hips. "What do you need to tell her you can't tell me?" Laughing lightly, David got his phone from his pocket.

Max glared at the red-head. "Don't be a shithead, David, its none of your fucking business." Max snatched David's phone, finding Gwen's contact while fending off a protesting man-child. Before calling, he lightly motioned for David to leave the room for privacy, and after 5 antagonizing minutes, he finally left.

The phone ringed twice, before a groggy Gwen picked up the phone. "What the fuck did he do this time, David?" She said blandly, and Max drew in a shaky breath.

"Gwen, it's Max. I've run into an issue." He frowned angrily, having to tell someone about this. A laugh honed in from the other side of the call.

"What, did you kill him? And so nice of you to call, ya little shit." Max stared at his chest, not laughing along.

"I have tits??? What do I do?" He blurted out, confused and embarrassed. 

Silence.

Then a laugh, a knowing laugh, before she stopped to breath. "Kid, Trust me when I say that David knows more about your case than I do. Just go up to him, Say exactly what you just said to me, and he'll help. Don't worry, he'll understand."

Before he could protest, Gwen hung up. Max nervously chewed his lip, panic creeping up his back. Gwen was the only person he thought he could rely on with this information,  _and she fucking hung up._ Angrily, Max chucked David's phone onto his queen-sized bed and gripped his curls. 

"What do you know about trust, you just fucking hung up me while I confided in your lazy ass. God, this'll never end.." Tears brimming at his eyes, Max stomped over to his room still keeping a tight hold on his hair.

It seemed mechanical how he swiped at the lone blade on his desk, growing tired of screwing it back in. Gritting his teeth, hot tears streamed down the young boy's face while furiously swiping at his wrist. Biting back the sobs, Max just let out choked thoughts into the area he thought would be a new start.

"How long until I'm having rocks thrown at me again?"

The red trickled down his forearm, dripping onto the wood floor. The thin line only let out dots of crimson sin, and Max grit his teeth before swiping again, presser harder.

"How long until Preston looks at me like the garbage faggot they saw me as back home?"

Still, last swipe looked like a mere scratch in Max's eyes. The teal was bright on his features, red eyes from his crying let them stand out more. The urge to press further was strong, to continue to dig deeper until he struck bone. Furrowing his eyebrows and drawing in a sharp breath, Max furiously attacked his arm.

The fury and disappointment that followed was just buried deeper into his soul, hidden away from any outsiders that may see him for what he was known for back then. The thick line left on his wrist was completely bleeding, heavy maroon blood pooling onto the wood.

Sobering up, Max blankly stared at the damage he had done. Sighing, Max stood and grabbed his rag, grabbing his wrist with it and heading towards the bathroom down the hall. David looked up from the couch, only for his smile to fall as he saw Max holding his wrist with a blood-stained rag with a look on his face that proved this wasn't the first time this had happened.

Locking the door behind him, Max climbed up onto the counter to grab the gauze and medical tape, carefully wrapping up his wrist. A steady knock echoed in the small bathroom, a worried voice cutting through. "Max? Are you alright?" David said, just as the door swung open. Max glared, unfazed, at David and trudged past him to grab his hoodie.

David didn't ignore what he saw on Max's chest.

When the younger boy was out of his room, David was sifting through his old binders to find the first one he ever had, knowing well that it would be small enough. Out of the corner of his eye, Black curls and blue fabric blurred together at his doorway, Max staring curiously. David smiled at Max, before he finally found his first binder.

"David? Look, just forget what happened earlier and listen to what I have to say now. I had to call Gwen because..I-" Max looked down before standing tall, letting his problems show. David laughed a little.

"I noticed earlier. Why didn't you tell me first?" He pulled out a peach-colored binder, holding it out to Max. His face softened, grabbing the fabric and inspecting it closely. "I'm the same, you know?"

Looking up at the older male, Max was speechless. David carefully peeled off his shirt, and Max covered his eyes. David laughed more. "David if you have boobs too I swear to  _god_ I don't want to see them."

David sat up. "No, but I used to. You can uncover your eyes, Max, its fine." Max peeked through his fingers, eyes trailing down to the 2 thick, pink scars on his chest. Max lowered his hands, and David was smiling sweetly. "If you don't know, it's called being trans. I got top surgery a few years back on my 21st birthday, I was saving since I was 12. That's the first binder I've ever had, and it still works. You can have all of my binders if you want them, but some are bigger than others."

Max eyed the binder, cautiously peering over at David. "Is it like a bra? What the fuck does it do?" David raised a single finger.

"Language, Max. And binders make your chest appear flatter, they help to make you pass as a male. You don't wear them for longer than 8 hours, you don't sleep in them, you don't exercise in them, and you only bind with binders. No ace bandages, no gauze, just binders. Also, Don't worry. I won't tell anyone." David smiled wider, pulling his shirt back on. "You have school tomorrow, you should go to bed."

* * *

Max stared at his body in the mirror, did they get bigger? Over the course of one night? What the fuck?

He tugged on the binder, getting stuck a few times. He felt it tighten around his chest, but barely saw a difference. Sighing, he tugged his shirt on.

That was when he saw the difference.

He looked like he did before, flat chested, but this time masculine. He smiled a bit, tugging on his hoodie and backpack, heading off to school. He had felt like he usually did, small and manly, but this time he was well aware of the binder tight around his ribcage. When he breathed in too deeply, he felt so much pressure on his ribcage he was convinced the binder would break.

Preston was waiting in the front of the school, Smiling brightly when Max approached. They hugged, The taller boy feathering kisses on Max's forehead and cheeks, eventually landing a quick kiss on the lips, messed up by Max's giggling and smiling.

Preston wrapped his arm around Max and looked down calmly. "So, Summer's approaching, huh? Tests are soon for us, state testing, then finals for the middle-schoolers. Do you think you'll be going to Camp Campbell during the summer?"

Max shrugged, looking down. "If David works there and stays there all summer, I guess I don't really have a choice. But if I had a choice? Fuck no." Laughing lightly, Preston rubbed Max's shoulder and hugged him closer. 

"Don't be like that, I'll just make sure to include you in my plays as well! I've been preparing a sequel for Romeo and Juliet, as hetero as it is. What camp do you think you'll sign up for?"

Staring his boyfriend dead in the eyes, Max said, "How about 'Suicide Prevention camp? Think they'd have that despite the whole reason I'd wanna die is being there in the first place? Kinda ironic if you ask me."

Just to escape the slightly rainy morning, the couple walked inside the building, hand in hand. "Max, come  _on._ It's not that bad, promise." Max scoffed.

"Oh yeah? Bet on it." Preston grinned widely, loving the reference. "If you're wrong about how bad this shitty ass camp will be, I will bury you alive in the forest."

With fake hurt, Preston placed a hand dramatically on his chest. "As your boyfriend, I am  _offended._ " Gasping softly, Preston and Max laughed lightly. The boyfriends hugged each other goodbye as soon as they had to part to their designated areas, hearts thumping loudly in their chests. 

* * *

** First day of Camp.. **

"Oh  _fuck_ no." Crossing his arms, Max took in the sight. The trees were tall and absolutely covered in leaves, leaving patterned shadows dancing on the dirt trail they walked on. The magic couple were arguing (ironic) over which kind of magic was more useful, Nikki was on the roof, hollering and laughing, Neil was glaring at the shitty setup of a science camp, Nurf was punching Space Kid, and all other kids were doing their other camp activities.

And boy, Max absolutely fucking lost it at Preston's getup.

He had a homemade shakesphere-esque costume, the Camp Campbell yellow shirt perfectly blending with the ridiculous outfit. His boots were abandoned (to Max's dismay) and replaced with purple ankle boots. Preston saw Max trying to hold back his excessive laughter, and deeply flushed red with embarrassment. He scrambled over to his laughing boyfriend. 

"It's theater clothing, Max! You uncultured swine, you know NOTHING of Elizabethan fashion!" At his dramtic comment, Max only laughed more.

"W-what the actual fuck?!" Laughing harder, Max collapsed in a fit of laughter. "What the FUCK are you even  _WEARING?!_ I think, I think I'm gonna fucking cry holy SHIT-" His laughing continued, and Preston glared down at him, unamused.

"Get used to it, cause this is my getup for camp. Everyone has their own personal look for the summer, and this is mine."

But all he was answered with was more hysteria.

* * *

**Sometime near the end of summer, before breakfast time...**

Max woke to a sharp pang in his abdomen, immediately waking him up. Everything about him felt wrong, and its moments like these that he was glad he didn't have to share a tent with anyone. His binder was off, but his chest still hurt along with the growing pain that felt like fire, twisting and growing. Max groaned, clenching his eyes shut and curling in on himself.

Reluctantly, Max sat up and made his way to the bathrooms, still groaning in pain.

He was almost scared half to death at the sight of his boxers, before faintly remembering that weird puberty talk in March. He shut his eyes and banged his head against the wall, annoyed that this had to happen now, of all times.

He cleaned up as much as he could get, disgusted by pulling the blood-soaked boxers back on. He trudged over to the counselor cabins, glad that both of them knew his problem well. His first thought was to go to David, but he had the testosterone talk with him when sharing stories about his transition, so David would just send him to Gwen anyway. He walked to her cabin, and banged on the door.

A groggy Gwen glared down at Max, still half-asleep. "The fuck, kid?" She glared at him, before sighing and pushing his way into her cabin. She protested, trying to ask what he was doing as he sifted through her drawers. Unfazed by the porn magazines, Max sighed in relief at the winged pads and small tampons. Gwen stood frozen as she watched Max take 10 of each before leaving without so much as a "thank you". 

***

Gwen had told David about her encounter with Max earlier that morning, and David slumped him shoulders. He knew he was forgetting something, the damn hormone blockers. By the stupid state law, David couldn't get Max testosterone until he had his birth certificate and insurance, which he can't get until Max's parents are properly taken to trial. For them to be taken to trial, Max has to be taken back to his old town to show up to trial, which Max shut down immediately.

They did their best to deal with Max, allowing him to skip camp activities throughout the 5 days he spent his shark week, gave him Midol during his cramps, satisfied his cravings, and made sure to not let any of the other campers know what was going on, saying he was sick and wanted to be left alone.

On day 3, Preston peaked his head into Max's tent while the counselors were watching the others fight at lunch. He was just wearing his hoodie this time, with his sleeves rolled up because of the heat. Max was curled up in his bed, reading  _A Wrinkle in Time_ and crying a small bit. Preston walked into the tent and crouched down beside Max, leaving the crying boy to look over at his boyfriend.

"Are you feeling better? David and Gwen said you were sick, but I came to visit you anyway." Preston tucked a loose strand of curls behind Max's ear, and the smaller boy closed his book.

"Nah, feel like absolute shit, Pres." Subconsciously, Max drew the blanket closer to his chest. He hadn't told Preston about him being trans yet, scared he would be made fun of. Preston softly smiled, planting a kiss on his forehead.

"Well, that just might be other symptoms then. You're not warm, so that's good. Also, I don't mind getting sick, so do you need anything?" He softly sat on the floor beside the small air-mattress. Max looked away from Pres, a wave of cramps hitting him again. He closed his eyes tight, drawing his knees to his chest in hopes the cramps would end soon. Preston immediately started rubbing his back, worry covering his face.

"What's wrong? Are you hurting? Do you need me to get medicine?" Questions came pouring through, and Max shook his head. He had decided, now or never. Today was the day he came out to his boyfriend.

He smiled lightly, sobbing just a bit. "You're such a good boyfriend, Pres. Do you think you'd ever hate me?" He slowly looked up at Preston, meeting worried eyes. The taller boy grasped his boyfriends hands, holding them tightly and staring at him dead in the eye.

"Max, nothing could ever make me hate you. You laughing at me in the beginning of the summer didn't make me hate you, your constant bad attitude doesn't make me hate you, your soft side doesn't make me hate you, you are you and that's why I'm dating you in the first place. Nothing can change that." Closing his eyes, Max pressed his forehead against Preston's.

"Do you think you'd hate me if I'm not entirely honest?" He looked him in the eyes, His teal eyes forlorn. Preston pressed a kiss to Max's lips quickly, locking eyes with him again.

"If you're hiding anything, I'm not forcing you to tell me. Do you want to tell me something?" Drawing in a breath, Max sat up. He closed his eyes as he arched his back, his feminine form showing through the small camp shirt. Preston's eyes widened, and Max slumped his back again, looking down sadly. 

"I'm, trans. If you want to break up with me that's fine, I just thought you needed to know-" He was cut off by quickly being wrapped in a hug, lifted up and twirled around. Laughing lightly turned into giggling to laughter, childish twirling in the little tent. Flopping onto the airbed, Preston smiled over at his boyfriend.

"Things make so much more sense now! Also, I'm guessing you aren't actually sick? You're..yeah. Well, you being trans changes nothing, you know?" Max and Preston laid down next to each other on the bed, and Max curled up and buried his curls into Preston's chest.

"David and Gwen already know. Just, don't tell anyone? Please?" Hugging his boyfriend tightly, Preston rested his head on his boyfriend's curls.

"I promise." Then a comfortable silence followed, leaving the couple cuddling up in the dim-lit tent. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tbh I'm self-projecting so much onto Max that its unhealthy
> 
> Also I think we all need a dad like David and a boyfriend like Preston or at least i need one cause they are the best bois
> 
> Follow me on tumblr if you want to as well, you can submit fan-art from this fic and ask me questions! I love all of you guys and I don't think i can even find the words to describe how giddy I feel when I see you readers literally scream in the comments  
> I get so happy you guys  
> you don't even know  
> my URL is lonelysail, so commission me or whatever my dudes!


	10. Can I Get A Witness? Part 1- Valentine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Max finally agrees to go to trial to let the judge decide if he goes back to Valentine and Evan or if he stays with David.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time to take a break from the gay (sadly) and go to angst, trials, Max's parents, and some Gwenvid my d00ds.
> 
> Tw: Self-Harm mention, Emotional Abuse, Physical Abuse, transphobia, slurs, mental breakdowns, alcohol abuse, and underage drinking.

The September air was still humid, Summer still lingering with the cold breeze of upcoming Autumn. Usually unkempt air was puffier than usual as the unchanging scowling boy trudged out of school and into the familiar car of his social worker. He had already hugged his best friends and boyfriend goodbye, already wishing he didn't have to leave at all even though he'd most likely be back. 

David played old 80's and 90's music in Gwen's car, already having each other's stuff packed for the trip. Never had Max ever wanted to stay somewhere, he had always wanted to escape whatever environment he was in. But Sleepy Peak really grew on him, with the old-fashioned style and people (except for the popular girls), the style felt almost like a better home than what he was about to be back in.

And boy, was he unprepared.

Gwen and David talked to Max, but he tuned them out and looked out the window, just wishing he could get the trials over with. It starts with his mom's trial, then his stepdad's. Going over his case in his head, looking for ways to dodge the accusations and lies they would spout about this just so they could have him back to torment once again.

Digging up old memories and having to relive them was the hardest part. Feeling those pangs of fear, guilt, and sadness by just merely peeking into his trauma-filled past.

_My mom took a long drag from her cigarette, puffing out smoke into the slightly rainy sky, turning down to me unamused. "Why aren't you ready for school? Go get dressed and stop looking like a hobo." She said, and a cough bubbled up from my throat. "Oh hell no, you're not fooling anyone. Get dressed right now or I'll punt you across town." I looked down at my feet, turning on my heel and trudging upstairs._

_My head throbbed and my nausea increased, I felt cold everywhere except my face, sweating and on fire. My legs barely held me up as I wobbled down to my room, trying to pull on my jacket with shaking hands. I sniffed, taking my mom's words and thinking that I was just faking it._

_Up until the moment I bolted out of my desk in school and threw up in the trash can, hurling out my lunch. The teacher sent me down to the nurse, and I laid on the paper bed feeling like absolute dog shit. The nurse looked over at me breathe heavily and shiver, taking my temp and immediately calling my mom whilst saying I had a fever of 103.8 and that if it raised any higher, I would need to go to the Emergency Room._

_My mom played surprised on the phone. "Oh! Maxine didn't say anything to me this morning! Sadly, I'm unable to pick her up from school because I'm on a tight schedule at work, but she is able to walk home! It's not too far away, she'll be fine." Without even a moment's hesitation, she hung up._

The ride was agonizingly slow, even when Max slept through most of it. At one point, when Max was asleep in the backseat, David was driving while Gwen took a break. He looked over at her, eyeing a bottle of vodka with intensive interest.

"Gwen. You won't be able to drive if you drink that, just wait until we get back to Texas. I don't want to drive while tired, it puts us all at risk. Besides, If Max's parents are innocent-"

Raising her hand to shush David, she sat up with passion in her eyes. "I've talked to his parents, David. They're not innocent at all. From what I have gathered by just analyzing Max and what his parents have said, he's not safe. You see how he always wears a hoodie? Even when it was hot as fuck? It's to hide abuse scars or self-harm, probably both."

"His parents outright use the wrong pronouns," David's frown deepened. "and call him by his dead name. When I walked into the police station to talk to Max, he had said about how his parents are excellent liars and that they could really care less about him. I already had a lawyer ready before we even left Sleepy Peak and Max will end up speaking in court and being questioned, but he probably knows that already."

David's grip tightened on the steering wheel. "I just don't understand how a parent couldn't even love their child! I believe that, even though they aren't supportive, they still love him just a little. I mean, I had a pretty strict dad, but he loved me nonetheless! Still, I know Max will be happier staying with me than with the people that hurt him." David, for the first time in a while, looked genuinely upset. 

"Some parents don't mean to have kids and are so angry they take it out on their children. You'll understand in these two trials, even learn ways of how not to discipline kids. Though, you're kind and fatherly already so that's not an issue." Gwen smiled, turning her head to hide her faint blush that dissipated on her tan skin. David beamed, mood picked up from the compliment.

"Thank you, CBFL! I think you're really smart and nice to help out Max and know all about his case!" Smiling wide, a light pink blush dusted his freckled face.

* * *

** Once they made it to Gwen's apartment back in Texas.. **

 

 The smell of coffee wafted through the little area, immediately calming all of Max's nerves. Explicit posters covered the walls, porn magazines and novels littering the small coffee table, leaving David uncomfortable. Though, Max swiped a few Playboy's and stashed them in his hoodie pocket for later.

Too tired to even care, Gwen walked over to her room and showed David the guest room, leaving Max to sleep on the (surprisingly comfortable) armchair. He wasn't complaining, David had bombarded his suitcases with his quilt and 2 pillows, so Max curled up on the couch no problem.

He tugged off his hoodie, arms only littered with fading scars and semi-new scratches from the adventures Nikki dragged him on. Apart from the scraped up palms he wore with confidence, Max was practically healed. No bruises, and its been a few weeks since he had actually self-harmed. That's progress, right?

Casually, Max grabbed one of the magazines and flipped through the pages, stopping on ones with topless women. He took a moment to admire just how beautiful the models were, skin glowing and figures so naturally curved yet thin. Deep down, Max loved the female body on women, but not on himself. His heart sunk as his knew that he'd have to grow up to look almost like these women, with wide hips and titties.

Tracing around the nipple of one of the women, Max grew bored and closed the paper magazine with a sigh. He tossed it back over to the coffee table, Stretching before standing up and trudging toward the kitchen.

Gwen sat on the counter, drinking what looks like her 3rd bottle of Jack Daniel's. Max frowned, remembering how his stepdad downed beer by the minute. After finishing off that bottle, Gwen finally noticed the younger boy in the doorway. Her eyes were distant, her frame swaying as she focused on him. Without thinking, Gwen hopped down from the counter with ease and pointed at the fridge. Her words were slurred, obviously drunk off her ass. "Booze's n the fridgezz."

Stumbling out of the kitchen, Gwen held her head while mumbling incoherent nonsense. Hesitantly, Max opened up the fridge and stared at the array of liquor, feeling too old as he was able to identify all of them. Words echoed in his mind, some saying he had a trial tomorrow and others saying ways to overcome a hangover and what to avoid.

So Max slowly grabbed a Corona and grabbed the bottle opener, popping off the cap with ease. He sniffed it, scrunching up his nose in disdain. Very slowly, Max raised the bottle to his lips before throwing his head back and chugging 3 mouth full's. He drew the bottle away from his mouth, coughing lightly in disgust. His head was filled with bees, buzzing and somewhat calming.

Naturally, Max downed the entire bottle while only breathing through his nose. He gripped the counter for support, feeling unsure of himself. He didn't feel drunk, just confused and unfocused. His attention was on absolutely nothing, but he still knew how to properly form a sentence. 

So he grabbed a bottle of Smirnoff and was halfway through the bottle before he had to breathe. Thoughts blurred together, and Max stared wide eyed at the floor. He screwed to cap back on, putting it away as he stumbled to his couch.

Before he drifted off, Max knew tomorrow would be hell.

*****************************************

Gwen couldn't think properly, but she already regretted telling Max where the liquor was stashed. Still, the only thing on her mind was to talk to David, to either drunk text him or slur her thoughts into a garbled sentence. 

So as she left her kitchen, she steered towards David room.

The red-head was watching cartoons on the small TV, Glancing up at the disheveled Gwen plop onto the bed. He frowned at the smell of alcohol on her, lightly combing his fingers through her curls. "The trial for Max's mom is tomorrow, I don't want you being hungover for it! What did you drink?" He said softly, as Gwen mumbled 'Jack Daniels' into the pillow. David sighed, standing up to get her a glass of water before he felt a tug on his sweatpants. Gwen hiccupped, hugging David messily. 

"Don't go, I'm sorry, just please don't leave."

 Confused, David watched Gwen cry into his shirt, his heart sinking low in his chest. He cuddled her to calm her nerves, to stop her shoulders from shaking, to ease her sorrows. The night was quiet, yet wild all the same.

* * *

**The Next Morning...**

David still had to play the dad role, taking care of two sick children. Gwen was noticeably worse since she drank more, all being dark liquor as well.

Max had a pillow over his eyes and an empty coffee cup next to him. It took a while to calm David down after figuring out his son had drank last night, worried sick for his health. He kept talking, and talking, and talking..

"David..." Max groaned. David spun on his heel and smiled down at his child. 

"Yes Max?" Max motioned for David to come closer, and once David was kneeling by the couch, Max grabbed a fistful of David's shirt and lifted the pillow of his eyes, glaring at the red-head.

"Shut. The fuck. Up." Max seethed, talking through gritted teeth. He let go of David, letting the pillow fall over his eyes again. Once released, David scrambled to his feet and dusted himself off, shutting up and backing away from the angry, hungover boy.

*****************************************

Max tugged on his hoodie and torn black jeans, much to David's disapproval. The three had to go to court in an hour, two of which were dressed nicely. The other, Max, was casual and proud. There was no need to act as a sophisticate, he was there for a trial based on abuse and nice clothes couldn't cover that up.

Heaving a sigh, the teal-eyed boy stared blankly at his reflection. Making a small effort, he combed his fingers through his damp yet messy hair, having just taken a shower. His binder felt tight around his chest, almost as if it was trying to suffocate him. Suppressing the urge to scream, Max left the small bathroom and walked out the front door, the lack of cold air setting Max off. 

He was already used to the biting wind of fall, the frost on the ground and the leaves falling. Now, as he's back in this godforsaken town, The memory of buildings cramped up in this city and the scorching heat all year round came back all at once. 

The shadows covered the building, Chase Bank and Sonic right across the street. He's passed here before, either from walking to restaurants or passing by while on the way to Wal-Mart. Suddenly, a red Saturn slowed down at the stop light, making him tense up. That's his mom's car. He knew from the dent on the bumper, from that time some woman had been on her phone. She had yelled at her for an hour, then angrily forgot why they even left the house.

His hands and knees were shaking. His mother's window rolled down, flicking her cigarette butt out the window before speeding off. With a gasp of fresh air, tears streamed down the boy's face as he caved in, collapsing onto his knees and screaming.

David immediately ran out, Dad mode activated at the sight of a screaming and crying Max. Neighbors opened their doors to the sight, looking suspiciously at David but dropping the look when they saw the same amount of concern and confusion in his eyes. Why was he crying?

He was well past his toddler years, and these screams weren't the same as he'd heard before. They were terrified yet relieved, sob-ridden and blood curdling. Soon, wheezing and heavy breathing were placed in-between screams, and David took that as the moment to place a hand comfortingly on his back.

His eyes were brighter, red rimmed and shocked. Max wiped away his tears on his sleeves, groaning in discomfort that he had broken down in front of other people again. David shot him a reassuring smile, while Max just stood up and continued his walk to the car as if nothing just happened.

Gwen had slowly walked up to David, helping him up with awe of the complete turn around in mood. She would definitely bring this up in court, to tell his lawyer about this and to ask about it while up there. 

And so they all left to City Hall, to face the first trial.

* * *

 

  **The First Trial - Valentine Kumar**

Officers littered the corners, leaving Max uncomfortable. It was no secret that he hates police, knowing that his mother would probably be arrested just for being Indian. He refused to look up from the table he had sat at, tucking his hands underneath his thighs. David sat behind him and often talked to him about how it'll all be okay. 

But it couldn't feel okay or alright when his mother sat a mere 10 feet away from him. He never looked at her since glancing at her when walking in, avoiding to look her in the eyes they shared. All he could hear were her sniffles, assuming she was crying. Max almost burst out in anger, almost screamed at her that she was the one who hurt  _him_. 

Soon enough, Judge Daniel had taken his place at his podium. He had looked like David without freckles and bleached hair, blue eyes gleaming. He wasn't sure that he, the guy who looks like a criminal, should be the judge, only further pressing his anxiety.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, We are gathered here today to discuss the case of Valentine Kumar and her daughter, Maxine Kumar, regarding child abuse. Mr. Stilson, please state your case for Valentine." His voice was cheery yet stern, as if it could bend emotion with the snap of his fingers. 

An old man, No older than 65, neatly stood and lightly bowed his head to the Judge. "Thank you, Your honor. Everybody, I'm here to state that Mrs. Kumar did not do any of the sort to her beloved daughter-" Max rolled his eyes. "-and that she is devastated her child would do such a thing to accuse her and her boyfriend, Evan." He swiped through pieces of paper, holding up a document with photos of baby Max and his mom together. 

"As you can see, love like this cannot possibly be faked. Their smiles are genuine and sweet, and all alleged problems seem to occur only recently. Why did she run away? Because she is a child who wants attention, I've seen it all the time." Max grit his teeth, glaring daggers at the old bastard.

"As my defendant, I'd like to call Mrs. Valentine Kumar to the stand." His eyes immediately looked over at his mother, standing and swiftly walking up to the witness stand and taking a seat. Her lawyer looking at his papers and up at Mrs. Valentine, ready to ask her the questions. "Valentine, How devastated were you when you had noticed little Maxine was gone?"

Her sad eyes and tight bun that kept having strands of loose curls fall over her shoulders and shape her face truly showed a convincing mother. With a deep breath, she glared at her lawyer. "I had already told you, His name is Maxwell or Max for short. He is my son, and the reason he ran was because I couldn't come to terms with that. When I had realized that was the reason, I couldn't forgive myself. Every day he wasn't here, I cried my eyes out, worried sick about what was happening in that foster home." Tears formed in her eyes, choking on her words and tears rolled down her cheeks.

Gwen stared at this fragile woman with disbelief. This woman had triggered a panic attack (or whatever had happened to the poor boy) from Max? No, couldn't be..unless..

_"I swear to god if I'm taken back you won't get what you would expect, they're excellent liars."_

This was all a well-crafted lie.

"I rest my case." Mr. Stilson said, finishing off with some unimportant details nobody paid any attention to. Judge Daniel nodded, turning towards Max and his lawyer to let Ms. Marsh speak.

"Thank you, Your Honor. People of the jury, It's very simple to tell the difference between an angsty, hormonal child and a traumatized one. I'll be defending Maxine Kumar, or soon to be Maxwell Selvans, under David Selvans' name. I'll present my evidence from dated back to January 23, 2012."

Max froze, eyes wide with horror. 

"Max, It appears you remember this day. Although I already have everything recorded on these documents, please state what happened on the day of January 23, 2012." Ms. Marsh waited for a few words.

But he said nothing. He sat there and tried to push it back, tried to repress it and never look into that day again. Tears pricked at his eyes, and his bottom lip quivered. He rubbed his eyes and tried to hold back from crying, and his lawyer saw his distress and decided to not press him about it. 

"Well, On the day of January 23, 2012, Mark Kumar had died of pulmonary fibrosis. His mom had induced labor early so Mark could see the baby, but little Savannah had been still-born. After he had died, MaX had been devastated and lost all hope in the world, attempting suicide twice in February of 2012. In the years 2013 and up to the night Max ran off, I've gathered reports of yelling, glass breaking, and loud thumps from the Kumar residence."

_"Go sleep with the coyotes, whore!"_

_"What the fuck did you say to me, Maxine?!" Evan yelled, smashing his bottle against the wall. I cowered, ducking backwards and crashing into the back wall of my bedroom. I glared at this prick who dared to get glass in my fucking carpet._

_With a swift movement, My body was raised off the ground, hitting my bed frame rather painfully. I cursed under my breath flipping off the douchebag as he slammed my door. I looked at the bruise forming quickly around my arm, trying my hardest not to cry._

Those nights, he had to lie to the police and endure the act his stepdad and mother had put up. He could remember those being the days he started wearing a hoodie.

"With that said, I'd like to call the defendant to the stand." Snapped out of thought, Max stood and climbed into the podium. Ms. Marsh glanced at her questions before looking up at Max. 

"Did your mother ever hit you?"

The question was straight-forward, blunt and to the point. Clearing his throat, Max shrugged. "Twice. Once when I first told her I wanted to be a boy and she slapped me, and the other when I didn't hide a bruise well enough and she smacked me upside the head. But mostly all the hitting was from Evan, my stepdad." He felt programmed, easily being able to say all of this with the power of knowing it'll all be over soon enough.

"Has your mother ever apologized for threatening, yelling at, or hurting you?" 

Shaking his head, Max smirked. "Never. It was always 'You shouldn't have been born' and 'I regret my teenage years' but never an 'I'm sorry' in all this time. I never really expected one, I always knew that most of the time it was my fault anyway."

The questions were thrown back and forth, hearing from Valentine and Max and even Gwen and David. At the end, Valentine was declared guilty and was sentenced to 3 years of jail time. 

All he had to do now was get through Evan's trial.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 will be out soon, continuing onto the next trial and the outcome of both trials.  
> also if you can point out the 2 references I made, I'll write more often lmaoo
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZI0CbYjprXc <\- Song that inspired this chapter and the next chapter


	11. Can I Get A Witness? Part 2 - Evan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Details of the Valentine trial and the painful aftermath of the Evan trial, how will Max react?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: Self-Harm mention, Emotional Abuse, Physical Abuse, transphobia, slurs, mental breakdowns, alcohol abuse, and underage drinking.

**During Valentine's Trial**

Max looked down at the wood patterns, listening to his mom speak nonsense. 

"Maxine! Are you even listening? Please, honey-" Valentine pleaded, begging for Max to look up at her. 

Suddenly, something inside Max snapped and he stood, slamming his hands on the table as he stared into his mother's eyes. "It's. Fucking. Maxwell. You made a fucking correction on it earlier to your shitty lawyer, or is it all another god damn lie!?" Max yelled, voice pitched and violent.

Valentine looked solemnly at her child, cupping her small, calloused hands together. "I'm sorry, Maxwell. Please calm down, Let me explain myself-" Once again, she was cut off by her son.

"No! Shut your fucking mouth and listen to  _me_ for once! You never let me speak, you used to always ignore me and what I had to say and just wrote it off as unimportant, but I'm sick of you! Do you remember when I cut all of my hair off because you didn't want me to be a boy? Remember when you told me I'm the reason you regret your teenage years the day I up and fucking left? Do you remember when you stabbed all of my balloons out with a kitchen knife on my birthday? Do you remember how fucking miserable you made me feel on the inside?!"

The little boy was in tears, furiously wiping them away on his hoodie. Valentine was speechless, staring up at her child with defeat. 

All she did then was sit back down, holding her head in her hands and softly crying over how terrible she acted.

The jury was silent, the judge had nothing to say to the outburst. David and Gwen looked hurt, shocked from seeing this angry kid show just how hurt he is. 

Then Max laid his head down, tangling his hands in his hair. 

* * *

**The Night After The Trial**

Max sat by the landline, anxiously peering over her shoulder in case David caught him drinking again. The next trial wasn't until Friday, so he could get hungover all he wants. He was fond of the wine Gwen had stored in the back of the fridge, almost finishing off the bottle. The line went right to voicemail again after the third call, and Max just assumed Preston was asleep. 

Sighing, Max downed the rest of the bottle and set it on the coffee table. Suddenly, the line started ringing, and Max rushed over to answer, tripping twice. Picking up, Nikki's voice chimed through. "Hey Gwen? You told me to call if I had any issues and I'm bleeding for no reason and the wolves still haven't come for me-"

Unimpressed, Max answered. "Nikki, that's called your period. Go get some tampons or pads or some shit, Gwen is passed out drunk." He slurred slightly, and Nikki gasped.

"Thanks Max! I was starting to get worried about this random gash in my face that won't leave and what the fuck is a tampon?" She questioned, and Max shot upright.

"That's why you wear those dumb bandages all the time? Nikki, you probably need stitches. Also, a tampon is a cloth you shoot into your vag to stop your period flow." Max explained, and Nikki went silent before bursting out in laughter.

"Wha-what the actual fu-fuck?!" The blue-haired girl cackled so loud, Max could hear her when holding the phone as far away as possible from his ear. Sighing in annoyance, Max hung up and grabbed another bottle. Once again, the phone began to rang and he picked up.

"Nikki, it's not that funny, I swear to fucking god I'm trying to drink away my problems." The minute he answered the phone, he was met with complete silence. A familiar voice laced with sarcasm spoke up, surprising Max to his core.

"Well, so much for a greeting." a light chuckle followed, and Max nearly melted at the sound. He set the bottle of gin down and smiled, relaxing into his chair.

"Oh, sorry. Nikki was just bothering me. Did I miss anything?" Slurring his words just slightly, Max talked to his boyfriend. It was during those conversations that Max failed to realize David walking to the living room, quickly gathering all the bottles he left around. 

Silence filled the other end of the phone. Then, in a soft voice he had never heard from Preston, he said, "Max, honey, have you been drinking?" At those words, Max slumped further into his chair, smile fading. 

"It slows my head down. You don't know what's it's like to remember everything at once and not be able to keep up." At that, Max hung up and threw the phone on the carpet. 

He didn't need another lecture. He can drink if he wants to, nobody can convince him otherwise.

Before he even knew it, tears streamed down his face. There wasn't a reason, but he was breaking down again. He buried his face into Mr. Honeynuts, curling into the recliner. 

David stared at the child solemnly, stuck between comforting him or leaving him be. He had the rest of Gwen's liquor in his arms to stash away, he couldn't stand the sight of a child drinking.

Quietly, David walked back to the guest room.

* * *

** Day of Evan's Trial... **

 "Motherfucker!" Max screamed over the balcony. Passerby peered up at him, but he just flipped them off and continued his furious yelling.

"That fucking piece of titty semen! God I wanna fucking murder that God damn uncle fucker!!" 

He had waited for the day he could tell off Evan professionally. The day he could say whatever he wanted without being punched, thrown, kicked, or starved. The air was hotter than it should be, but that's Texas for you.

David slid the door open slowly, handing Max a cup of coffee. Graciously, Max accepted, and downed the bitter drink. All alcohol was gone, so Max had pent up his anger to release it all during the trial. 

Hesitantly, David placed a hand on Max's shoulder. He flinched, not liking the contact. Noticing, David retreated his hand back to his side, standing next to his son. "Max, I understand that you're angry. But please don't insult Evan the entire time, it'll only make you look bad." Max could agree with him there, that only gives evidence to Evan's statement of Max being an angry teen (even though he's 11).

Easing up, the young boy slumped his head over the balcony, curls frizzing from the humidity. After today, Max will either go to live with Evan or live with David.

With the confidence of winning this case, Max followed David out to his car with Gwen in the backseat. She was still tired, but not hungover this time. The drive felt too short for all of their liking, all hoping for some delay in this terrible trial. David wasn't prepared to see Max break down again, and neither was Gwen. Despite the fear of losing and expecting a heartbreaking scene, all three of them hurried up the court steps and into their respective seats.

And it begins.

* * *

** After the Trail... **

He was frozen in his seat, staring at his hands in horror. 

He had lost. Evan had won.

David and Gwen sat still, shocked. Evan was talking to the judge, signing papers while the court tried to get Max to sign his respected files. With a tight grip on his hair and tears spilling over his cheeks, Max let out an agonized scream, his last attempt to try and persuade the jury, to try and convince everybody that this man is not fit to take care of him.

Holding a hand over his own mouth, David cried softly. Gwen looked wide-eyed at her heels in distress, and all the judge did was glare at the sight. Standing, Max glared back. "I. Am. _NOT._ Signing your stupid fucking papers!" He yelled, tugging off his sweater to reveal his destroyed arms. Sobbing, Max raised his arms and spoke, bottom lip quivering and voice cracking.

"How is this fair? These arms used to be covered in bruises he had caused, these arms used to be clean until he came into my life. He used to pull my hair, throw me outside to freeze, used to punch me and kick me until my self-esteem lowered enough for me to embed my pain into scars I'll never forget!" 

Hugging his body, he dropped to his knees and broke, sobbing into the carpet. Faces of the jury were rid with guilt, looking around at their peers in regret. Evan bent down and rubbed his back to try and comfort, and he flinched. "It's okay, don't go this far to get me in trouble just cause you hate me, brat." He whispered, and Max shoved him off. 

"Oh, I'm a fucking brat? Oh yeah I'm totally a brat for being traumatized, huh?? Fuck you!" Standing up and pushing Evan more, a policeman grabbed Max and held him back. Not struggling, Max glared at Evan then looked back up at the judge. "I can't go back there. You can't let him manipulate you!"

_Emotionless, I made direct eye contact with Evan. My curls whipped around as I drew my foot back and quickly kicked him in the balls with everything I had, landing a punch to his throat when he fell to his knees. Just a few moments before that, Evan had tried to grab my hair. He would have kicked me in the stomach, thrown me into the table, or raised me off my feet to meet his eyes and smell his alcoholic breath up close. I knew it._

_He chocked, coughing while rubbing his throat and leaning over in pain. Immediately, I ran upstairs and found a closet, I knew too well he would think I'd go into my room and hide under the bed or in my own closet, so I buried myself underneath the sheets and towels in the closet next to the bathroom. I felt so proud to get away with it that night, the morning after was only remembered by me and all Evan could remember was how hungover he would be._

Crying, He let his head fall and closed his eyes. "Please.."

_"Oh, so you're a tranny AND a faggot, now? Stop begging for attention, whore. That shit ain't cute." The front door slammed, the tension hanging in the air as I stared at my old shoes, almost completely torn up. Picking up my backpack and running a hand through my freshly-cut hair, I left for school out the backdoor._

A mallet collided with a gavel, catching the attention of everyone in the room. "Let the kid go, Officer Stevens. I'll allow a re-vote from the jury, everybody please return to your seats."

And just like that, He's free. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh shit This lives on!!
> 
> thank you all for your support and patience. I just couldn't leave this book behind and its kinda rushed at the end, but I'm back to writing more often!


	12. What Happened to Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All suspicions of self-harm were justified in court, leaving some bonding between David, Gwen, and Max.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: Self-harm, emotional abuse, suicidal thoughts, depressive episodes, and physical abuse.

On the ride back....

Usually bright eyes at even the darkest of moments were dull, unfocused and staring out the window. Eventually, they fluttered shut, leaving a small boy asleep against the cool window.

David and Gwen were silent, listening to music at low volume. Running his hand through his hair, David looked back at his foster child and hoped he was dreaming with happy thoughts.

"What did I say on the ride here? Valentine and Evan are guilty, even if Valentine is sorry, she still hurt Max enough to break him down." Brown eyes stayed focused on the road, trying not to glance over at sad, emerald eyes.

Hesitantly, David spoke. "..On the day he came out to me, he was holding a bloody rag to his arm. I thought it was an accident, I hoped it was, but after seeing all the scars..." Trailing off, David looked out the window as well.

Gwen turned up the music.

* * *

 Back at Sleepy Peak...

When he first got here, Max got annoyed at David being awake before Max. He would make breakfast, drive him to school, and not even care. David never minded cooking for Max, driving him places, or doing chores. It relaxed him.

Today, David was watching fried eggs sizzle on the metal pan, a plastic spatula slipping underneath with ease and flipping breakfast gently to not break the yolk.

5:30, right before the sun would rise, is when David woke up. He got dressed, made tea and sipped it while watching the early morning sky change in color over the trees, then began to cook so Max could get the most important meal of the day.

Once everything was 100% ready, it was 6:30. 6:00, right when the sun was peeking over the treetops, is when Max usually woke up. He would come out of his room fully dressed and ready at 6:15, then try to walk to school before David would call him back to eat.

Now, Max wasn't awake yet. Opening the door slightly, David peeked his head in at the boy who laid in the mess of pillows and blankets. Gently shaking him, Max's eyes sprung open, exhausted despite sleeping for 13 hours. David had to carry him into the house after the ride back.

Groaning, Max's eyes glazed over at David, rubbing his eyes. That's now the usual routine, having to wake Max up instead of expecting him to do it himself. Needless to say, David was borderline worried. Sure, it's great that he's getting more sleep instead of being restless, but he has gotten calls from Ms. Jen about sleeping in class and late assignments.

Just like another morning, David went to wake Max up. Wild curls, recently trimmed to Max's liking, were hidden by blankets. About to shake him awake, Max sprung up and gasped. Fear painted a usually exhausted face, small hands reaching up to get a fistful of hair and pull. 

Nightmares. They tainted his sleep, always keeping him up at night and only leaving when the sun would start to rise. He could never get a good night's rest.

Then, one night when they pulled him awake once more, Max got up and walked out of his room, leaving his hoodie behind. Only wearing a t-shirt and sweatpants, Max hung his head low and opened to front door.

His bare feet touched to cold concrete, then crunched over leaves. He could feel the frost, the ice on the curbs and embedded on each blade of grass. Bumps gathered on his arms and legs, he could see the carbon dioxide leave his body.

Like a zombie, Max dodged trees and continued to walk through the forest surrounding his little cabin. The train of thought that used to whip by so fast he could only catch a glimpse of now crashed, he couldn't  _think._

Running on autopilot alone, Max tripped over a hidden root and rolled down the small hill. Bits of snow and chunks of ice gathered in what he supposed was a creek, letting it sink into his bones.

Any other day, he would just stay in bed. He would cut himself or make some coffee, never leave the cabin he felt so safe in. Any other day, he would have gotten warmer clothes, closed the door behind him, and wait until morning.

But today, he fell asleep in the ice with an already frozen mindset.

* * *

"-ax!" 

He was so cold, so cold. Gray clouds coated the sky, little snowflakes fluttering onto him. In a few hours, he would be buried. The thought hugged his chest, pulling onto his soul and sinking him deeper into the ground.

"Max! Max!!"

Multiple voices called after him, and his voice couldn't yell back. Physically freezing and mentally thawing, he had no idea what was happening. His face felt warm, really warm, and when the wind blew, the water on his cheeks was draining the warmth away. That bit of warmth had the train slowly moving again, thoughts flooding through.

_It's so cold._

Hugging his bare arms, Max drew his legs to his chest, now soaked from snow. 

_Maybe if I close my eyes again, I can finally be happy._

He shut his eyes, looking for some kind of light or fire that he could escape to. He has everything he wanted, he's escaped from what made him so angry. Why did he still feel so tired and depressed? Why did his chest hurt so much when nothing injured him?

"Max! I found him! David, Over here!" An overly exaggerated voice snapped him awake again, feeling arms start to wrap around him then a sharp inhale from what Max recognized as his boyfriend's. "You're so cold.." Shocked, Preston carried Max as best as he could, heading up the hill and soon being taken by David. After five minutes of biting wind, warm air hit his face the second he got inside.

Groaning, Max fully came back to reality, mind thawed. "Put me down. I have legs." His voice was like gravel, and he coughed to try and clear his throat. The crackling sound from his chest was concerning, David ignoring his protest and laying him down on his bed.

Preston sat on the bed and pecked Max's forehead, staring into his glazed over eyes. "That was idiotic, Max. The fuck??" Smiling sadly, Max looked at the window.

"Everything has been shit. If I had left my bed and went searching for something amazing, maybe I would feel better. If I froze out there, maybe I'd-" Chocking on his words, Max sat up and buried his face into his thin chest. 

Hugging back, Preston rested his head on top of the cold boy. "There isn't that many amazing things. I should say something reasurring, but this world is very depressing and filled with very horrible people. I don't blame you for feeling like this, helpless and tired. But, the small things that make life worth living are still there."

"Yeah, I know. Cats, coffee, rain, music, you, hoodies, etc." Looking up at Preston with a lopsided frown, Max crossed his legs and pressed his knees against Preston's. "Plus, I wouldn't want to look like an edgy coward after I kill myself. Suicide just isn't fuckin worth it, I'll still be hated by Evan, the Woodscouts, and all those fuckers in Texas."

"Thank god Gwen took you here, no cynical asshole other than you can ever make all of us this happy." Preston smiled softly, running his fingers over bare arms covered in scars and scabs. His smile faded into soft sadness.

Hesitating, Max drew his arms back. Scowling, Max looked down at his own lap. "Sorry, I should've said something, That was dumb of me. Don't tell the others, though. This isn't their fuckin' issue." 

Slender fingers wrapped around the small, tortured wrist and raised it to soft, pink lips. Up and down each arm Preston gently kissed each injury with care. Though his shoulders were tense, Max pursed his lips and smiled tightly. "That's gay." He breathed, laughing softly.

Raising an eyebrow and smirking slightly, Preston placed one last kiss to a puffy scar near Max's inner elbow. "My bad, I was going for homosexual." Genuine laughs echoed through the small room, lights dimmed and fairy lights shining. As much as Max pretends to hate the succulents perched on his desk, he still waters them without David telling him to or doing it for him. 

As their laughed died down, their cheeks hurt from smiling but they couldn't stop. Resting their foreheads together, the two locked eyes. Everything bright was back in teal eyes, little specs of life shining in his pupils. "Your forehead is warm." Preston mumbled, resting his hand on Max's cheek. 

Raising an eyebrow and leaning closer, Max put his hand over Preston's. "It's fine. I went to school in 2nd grade with the flu and my mom made me walk home. I had a fever of 103.8, I think. I haven't been worse than that." Shrugging, Max looked at Preston's angry eyes.

"If you ever end up going to Texas again to see your mom or whatever, bring me with because I will throw hands with that cunt."

Leaning in and giving a quick kiss to his boyfriend, Max smiled at how angry and flustered Preston was. Leaning in again, Preston kissed softer, moving his lips and closing his eyes. Moving with, Max leaned in closer until he was in Preston's lap, running his hands through Preston's dark curls.

"Max, I made you some coffee to warm you up-" Stopping, David stared at the two boys who didn't even hear him. Smiling, David slowly picked up a shirt left on the floor and chucked it at the two. Screaming, They broke apart immediately. Max stared at David with wide and angry eyes while Preston refused to make eye contact while standing at the far end of the room. 

"Get out!" Max screamed, chucking the shirt back at David and shoving the giggling man out the door.

* * *

 

 "You could have  _died._ "

"Nice."

"Jesus fuck, Max! You're lucky this is all that happened."

After spending his third day off of school, Nikki and Neil had decided to pay a visit to their friend. He had been in bed most of the time while absent, dealing with a fever and an aching stomach. He was barely sick, he usually dealt with a runny nose or an irritating cough, but the death sickness that snuck up on him years ago decided to return because of that dumbass stunt he pulled.

Though delirious and unable to stand, Max still refuses to admit he's sick or that Preston was absolutely right to worry about his warm forehead. He had told the story of stumbling into the forest late at night and all that, But all they could do was make smart remarks about it instead of trying to help him understand why it happened.

Which, in fact, Max was grateful for. Talking about emotions has been happening too much, all he wants is to meme.

"Shit bro, I don't even know if I was high but maybe David slipped something in that tea, bro." 

"Oh fuck, possession maybe?" With a smile stretching from cheek to cheek, teal curls bounced with curiosity and pink eyes glowed with wonder. Neil raised and eyebrow and sighed.

"I'm going to break your phone if you don't stop watching Buzzfeed Unsolved." His new braces added a very slight lisp to his words, which never failed to be the subject of punishment went it came to comebacks with Nikki.

"Sthe sthupernathural isth real, Blue Bar." Over-exaggerating the lisp and letting spit fly in Neil's face, He wiped a hand on his face and promptly raised it back to flip Nikki off.

"Do you think ghosts don't like getting their dicks cause they GhostBusters flashbacks." Max mumbled, and Nikki immediately began to laugh obnoxiously. Neil squinted and grinned at both Nikki and Max, who looked in another universe entirely. 

Then he began to cough, ones that shook his shoulders and chest. His chest burned and his throat was filled with knives, head filled with helium. At a loss of what he should do, Neil reeled his hand back and smacked Max's back over and over until he could breathe again. For a split second, they looked worried.

"rip." 

Then they were back to typical middle-schooler behavior.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oofith, I'm back on track. I went back and edited all the chapters by fixing typos and grammar mistakes as well, so yeet.
> 
> also i felt like writing a sickfic with angst so here ya go


	13. Everything is Finite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the incident one month ago, we see how Max is doing in the cold and quiet forest of Sleepy Peak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: Suicidal Thoughts, Depression, and Referenced emotional and physical abuse

Silence.

...

_tick._

The tapping of an impatient foot.

A nervous cough.

...

_tick._

"Why the fuck am I even here?" Deep brown curls bounced, puffed by the humidity in the October air, as the vexed boy sat next to his hunched foster-father and across from his fidgeting social worker. The office wasn't really clean, but it was only in a building shared amongst counselors. The taut girl had two different offices, one near her apartment, and one near Sleepy Peak. 

"Max, just, how are you doing?" Pen resting between shaky fingers and strands falling out of her bun, Gwen shot a worried look at the boy resting in a blue chair hardened with age and use. His arms and legs were crossed, eyebrows naturally pinched closed and mouth scrunched into a scowl. Smiling down shakily at unwavering frustration broiling behind teal eyes.

"Peachy." Spat said child, pulling loose threads from the cuffs of his hoodie. David pressed his lips into a thin line, eyes fixated on Max and hoping he won't leave the room and try and walk home again.

This kind of behavior only seemed to drag on. He gets small counseling from Gwen and David 3 times a week, and so far he was at his 9th visit and Halloween was tomorrow.

No progress in understanding the way this young boy worked.

Taking a deep breath in and out, Gwen sat up straight and smiled casually at her client, looking at him more than down at him to be civilized. "What are you gonna do tomorrow? Any cool parties with the other campers?" She rested her chin on her hand, elbow over the papers she was supposed to fill when asking prodding questions.

Taking a short glance and David, Max looked at David and smirked. "Trick or treating." Then slyly winked at Gwen with a mischievous smile. Once being a little shit herself, Gwen knew damn well this child wasn't gonna ask for candy and dress up.

* * *

**(Halloween...)**

"Why can't we just go trick or treating with Harrison and Nerris? Once we're in high-school, we've missed our chance. Next year will be my last Halloween, you guys!!" His black sweater came from his dad, cut up so the sleeves were long but the top had tears around the neck and just below the naval. His detailed skeleton mask, matching everyone else's, rested on top of his black beanie, also identical to everyone else's. 

With a devilish smile and a glint in his eyes, Max had pulled his own mask over his face as two cartons of eggs rested in his arms. "All candy here is off brand, I had three rich neighborhoods back in Texas where i scored barrels of candy and I made it a tradition to egg the houses with their lights off. Also, what's the point in asking for candy-"

"Stealing is  _illegal._ " His wild brown 'fro only seemed to puff with fear and anger, as Max gestured to Nikki with the same shit-eating grin.

"When Nikki could attack children or score money from her mom? We could sweep the shelves with her credit card and her tits will make up for the payment  _plus_ interest." Shrugging, the Indian boy took a step back as Nikki raised her eyebrows and shot finger guns at Max.

"Me or my mom? We both have a pretty rockin' rack." Cupping her own chest and moving the rolls of toilet paper under her armpits, her toothy grin reached her eyes at all the boys groaning in disgust.

"Nikki,  _gross._ " Covering his eyes and turning red at her actions, Neil moved his mask over his face. His hand covered the eye holes, as Max let Preston put his hands over the smaller boys eyes, shoving his face into Max's combed curls, doubling in size at the humidity.

Though his voice was slightly muffled, his naturally loud voice made it easier to hear the words he screaming into his boyfriend's head. "Are you done? There's gays here who would rather not be exposed to your self-groping." Max laughed, leaning his body closer to Preston's and smiling.

Smiling at the little display of affection, Nikki let her hands drop and hold the toilet paper correctly in her arms. "That's really gay I love it." She smiled at the couple, and Neil uncovered his eyes and groaned at the display. He wasn't one for romance, he has a crush but he would never act on it. Eventually, Preston lifted his head back up, took his hands off the teal eyes glazed with the after-effects of affection, and looked at the others. 

"You're really straight and I hate it." Inevitably, his scowl stood prominent on his face once again, eyes locked in a glare with everything alive and breathing. "I'm gonna egg your mom's house first, then Nurf's cause I fear god nor death." Leading the way in knee-high black combat boots, Max let the others catch up without slowing his pace in the slightest.

Knowing the lovable theater nerd, it only took the tall boy two minutes to start playing an outdated bop, a fuckin' classic that had Max smiling, and a cheesy old tune everyone knew but simultaneously hated and loved. Of course, said songs were Spooky Scary Skeletons, This is Halloween, and Monster Mash. 

Meanwhile, after he ran out of Halloween music, Preston's little LG began to play goth music and creepy tunes meant for cult members. That reminded Max to stop by the entirely white house, the blonde man that sat on the porch stabbing soaps looked eerily like his own caretaker. 

Their first house (Max never goes against his word) was easily the best of the night. Though rusty on his aim, Max enjoyed the old tradition and ended up hitting the doorbell. Nikki was tossing toilet paper, unaware that this was really her mom's house, and a roll was flying in midair when the egg hit the chime. The four stopped, frozen in their slightly damp shoes, then bolted the second Candy drew the curtain to see, completely shirtless.

Soon the gang was getting tired, running out on supplies and motivation. Once the presumed cult house entered the shortest's eyes, He immediately began the run to the lawn. There was fear and anger embedded into each throw, encouraging everyone else to use everything they had left. Neil knew the house, finally joining in on chucking toilet paper that only sprawled out on the grass. He opted for eggs.

After the last egg was thrown, Max spit on the ground and flipped off the house. All the lights turned on, sending the four running to the nearest house with decorations. By the end of the night, 6 homes were soiled and the four traded the candy they scored.

 

Needless to say, David was confused when he saw a two dozen egg carton filled with sweets in the fridge.

* * *

**Therapy..**  

 "So, how was Halloween?"

Max only flipped her off. 

As per usual, Gwen let her mouth fall flat and nodded, folding her hands on her desk and letting her shoulders tense. "Kid I convinced David to leave the room today but it doesn't mean you don't have to speak. I made him leave so you could feel more  _comfortable._ " Raking a tense hand through her hair, Gwen nearly snapped when Max only began to lounge in the flea-ridden seats.

 "Why the fuck did you let yourself freeze in the middle of the woods, kid?"

"Why the fuck do you have to stay here talking to me when you could be fucking David?"

They ended weekly therapy early that day.

* * *

**A November Monday..**

Waking up and knowing his entire week would suck only started the terrible mood Max has been in. He always had the fuckin' worse PMS and having to endure school with it only fueled his headache.

Successfully avoiding a ride to school by jumping out his window, gaining a detention for being rude to teachers (that he would definitely skip), and barely avoiding being late to his first class was just his morning. Ms. Jen seemed extra loud today, talking on and on about some math shit that never fucking mattered, technology exists now.

"Does anybody remember the formula of Pythagorean Theorem?" 

Nikki raised her hand high, practically bouncing out of her seat.

"While I love your enthusiasm, Nicolette, I want to hear a new voice this time." Her bright blue eyes scanned the class while every single kid shrunk into the plastic chairs. Well, Everybody except Max who kept his hands over his eyes. "Oh! Maxwell, please state the formula."

Uncovering his face and well past being done with everything and everyone, Max glared at Ms. Jen and wrinkled his nose with increasing rage. "My name is Max, not Maxwell. Don't bother speaking in formalities if you're only an accent away from being a complete valley girl."

All whispering and laughing ceased, every conversation stopped, and now all eyes were on the brave ass kid who insulted the teacher. 

"Excuse me, sir? Go down to the principals office, your behavior will not be tolerated in my class!" Her eyes were wide with surprise and confusion, dramatically pointing her finger to the door and resting her other had on her hip.

"Don't feel like it, would rather hear screech like metal scraping against glass."

"Leave this instant or I will call her down to drag your smart mouth into In School Suspension!"

Shooting an annoyed look at her, angrily grabbing his stuff and kicking the chair over, Max walked out of the classroom. His head pounded, all lights brighter and all noises blaring. He felt weak and angry, sore and tired.

He was in pain.

Each step downstairs felt like a chore, his hoodie keeping his overheated but his cramps still felt like icicles stabbing his insides.

Once the final step was cleared, he wasted no time finding the nearest exit and leaving the school.

* * *

**Meanwhile, with his other friends..**

 The only thing stopping Nikki from cheering and laughing was the heavy tension in the air. Ms. Jen had two fingers pinching the bridge of her nose, until she stood up straight and forced a smile. Letting her usual excitement show, Nikki smiled back and sat up straighter, pigtails bouncing on her shoulders.  A few kids coughed, she could hear some kids whispering while the aggravated teacher let her chair scrap against the floor while she plopped down at her desk.

Usually the class never radiated fear or thought about the consequences of their actions, usually Nikki could break a kid's arm and Ms. Jen wouldn't be upset about it. Usually, a fake compliment at the start of class kept her happy and even Max couldn't stress her out. Today, however, was obviously unusual. 

Once the bell rung, kids practically filed out the door like soldiers to avoid being sent to wherever Max was now. A familiar tuft of neat curls caught her eye, his legs crossed while tapping his foot on the linoleum tile. His chipped nail polish was still prominent against his black phone in his hands. Once the lean boy noticed Nikki, he stood up straight and looked around for who she assumed was Max.

"Your Juliet got sent to the office, he has a stick up his ass or something today but he's really pissy." Nikki said, poking her thumb into Preston's stomach. Flinching and furrowing his brows slightly, he pocketed his phone and sighed.

"Oh, what did he do this time?" Sighing through his sentence and pretending to look unfazed, his hazel eyes were tinged with concern and small traces of loneliness that could only be taken away by Max's presence. 

"He roasted Ms. Jen into oblivion, said something about her being one screech away from being in a valley or something." She made her way to her next class, history with nobody she particularly likes but will talk to anyway. Preston had science with Neil, and he was slightly pissed he had to walk past his class so he could walk Max to math class.

"Wack." Was all Preston had to say in response, speed-walking away from 'Chaos manifested in one vessel', as the drama king likes to put it. She effortlessly kept up with his pace to purposefully piss him off.

It took one (1) hip push to get her to go to her respective class and leave him be, slumping into his seat by the window. He had a clear view of the entire back of the school, used to the playgrounds for different ages, basketball court, soccer nets, and 2 tether-ball poles (only one was functional, someone popped the ball on the other one.)

 Lackadaisical, disgusted, and humorous faces were seen throughout the room but there was one thing grabbing Preston's attention: a familiar tuft of curls walking across the playground and towards the fence separating the school from the outside world. 

Powered by homosexuality alone, Preston's bangs flew wild as he bolted down the steps and towards the doors. Teachers downstairs were still tending to the elementary young-lings who could barely read, therefore he simply flew out the doors and towards  ~~the love of his life~~ his clearly pissed off boyfriend.

His small hands were already clinging to the wire and fixing to jump over, pushing himself up with his feet but being slowed by the weight on his back and inside his head. He needed solitude, he needed to leave this crowded area and just calm down. 

"Baby, what the hell are you doing?" Mud gathered on the bottom of Preston's boots as he chased after Max, anxiety knotting in his chest. For once, looking his best didn't matter, he had more important matters to deal with. 

The smaller man didn't even hesitate. He continued to pull himself up and over, until grabbed at the waist and tugged into thin but powerful arms. To Preston's surprise, Max didn't even fight to be free. 

He scrunched himself up into a ball until he was too heavy for Preston. 

"Max, please, what's going on? Are you okay?" His voice was uncharacteristically soft and slow as he sat in the grass, propping Max against the fence while still balled up. The smaller boy kept his knees to his face and arms crossed over his knees. His voice was tiny instead of confident, he looked ready to break instead of looking so solid that everybody feared they would never know who the real Max was.

"I thought I would be happy here." Mumbled, broken, quiet, and vague. Confused, scared, intense, and tired. Eight adjectives and all of their synonyms for just one seemingly simple sentence.

"I thought if I was away from a life so bullshit and were finally loved, everything would be completely okay. I thought being free of too many judging eyes that I would finally like myself." His chin now rested on folded arms, teal eyes bleak and vulnerable as they gazed at hazel, borderline yellow, pupils. The owner of those wonderful eyes Max grew to find comfort in rested his hand on his arms, another cupping his face. 

His confused and upset expression melted into this completely emotionless look, eyes fixated on nothing and mouth slightly open even when he finished speaking. This painfully netrual expression only shed light on  _just how young_ this entirely damaged boy really was.

 "So why am I so close to.. why am I so close to killing myself again?" 

Two young boys, one in 6th and another in 7th, sat by a slightly rusted wire fence. Bent by the weight children who leaned against the twisted metal, one small child had been lost and sunk into grey wire bent in diamond shapes, one child was pulled from the fence and into arms that guaranteed protection. Light wind pushed small swings from the playground nearby, creaking and filling the silence that followed the small boy. 

Prominent blue hues tainted the site, from slides to skies to faded old hoodies stained with memories better off left behind. Teal, navy, cerulean, Prussian, cobalt blues mixed with an atmosphere heavy with emotion and chemical imbalances. 

Two young boys sat in the wet grass, but the water that left them damp and the mud that left them soiled didn't matter.

The only thing that mattered was making sure the smaller boy, the 6th grade child, never shattered while under the care of the 7th grade taller kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you tell life isn't being too great right now? or ever?
> 
> Guess if I'm gonna have a bad life, might as well project it onto characters people actually love.
> 
> What was your favorite part of this story now that it's over?

**Author's Note:**

> h e c k
> 
> Welp wasn't that fuckin sad,,
> 
> As I stated before, some of these scenes are based off my own experiences with abuse and depression. I know the story is kinda shit but I tried I swear,,,


End file.
